Messy

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The attendings lounge was a good place to hide from residents between surgeries and today Hanna didn't want to be burdened with teaching Decluca how not to be an asshole for the seventh time. She just felt like he had too much arrogance for what his skills were and he needed to earn that level of cocky-ness before she deemed it acceptable. But anyway, she also had her own problems to deal with.

She sat in silence as she mulled over all her prospects again and added in their recent activity together. And she was even more annoyed that they seemed to come out fifty fifty again. It always came down to, make a decision Hanna. Why couldn't it just be easy and have a clear winner? As she was thinking Arizona came into the lounge.

"You okay?" She asked looking over at Hanna who was slouched on the sofa with her head leaning back.

"I'm a mess," she replied, not moving at all.

"Well that's a good way to start," Arizona sighed as she made her way over to the sofa, "what's wrong?"

"I have a dilemma but I'm starting to think that I'm the only con between them," Hanna explained, "when two really nice people are in front of you and you are a hot mess that could easily bring down at least one or both, do you just leave the situation? Cause I'm messy, even when I'm out together I'm a mess because how put together can a smashed mirror really be? I was raised without consequence so now I don't believe in them, I'm arrogant and reckless with the people around me. I've done it a thousand times and they don't deserve that. I am a hot mess that no one deserves."

"Hanna, you are not a hot mess," Arizona smiled down at her, "you are freshly put back together And you've been hit by a curve ball. You're tower is shaking, not knocked over. And you deserve happiness, so stop putting yourself down."

With a warm smile for comfort Arizona got up from the sofa and left Hanna to wallow in her self pity for as long as she chooses.

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