Insecure {AUGUST ALSINA}

77.

AUGUST

Kaden's face turns pale and he gasps when he sees me standing at the door glaring at him. I feel naive and gullible for never thinking of him as capable of something like this.

It makes so much sense. The time I got ambushed, I was coming from his store. That was the very first time the thought of someone trying to kill me ran through my head. Time passed and nothing happened so I stopped worrying. Then these past few months, things started back up again and it only makes sense that someone who's angry about my past is behind it.The only thing I hate more than having regret is feeling stupid and those feelings turn into immediate anger.

My body temperature rises and my hands ball themselves into fist. Intense rage engulfs my body and I can't speak because my throat is balled in knots. Knots of complete infuriation, I'm afraid of what I might do.

"Leave." I tell Ashton, only turning my head lightly so that Kaden is still in my view.

He quickly backs out of the room but then he stops, taking a step forward. "You can't kill her dad." He whispers.

"She's better off without him." I say carelessly, no matter if I believe it or not.

My jaw locks and I place my fingers around the gun sitting in my waistband. I give Kaden a death stare; with hooded eyes I stare at the look of shock that's stuck on his face.

"Don't tell her." I tell Ashton.

"What!?" His eyes widen.

Before he says anything else about Catalina I close the door, forcing him to move his other foot out of the way. If he knows what's best for him or Catalina he'd walk away before it escalates. I lock the door and take a couple of steps towards him, keeping the distance.

"So now what?" Kaden raises an eyebrow and shrugs his shoulders, accepting the fact that he's been caught.

"You tell me."

I look him in his eyes and all I see is Catalina. He has the exact same eyes as her, they're so much alike that I don't think I'd be able to look him in the eyes even if I wanted to kill him—all I'd be able to see is her. I stare at him and can't think of anything else to say to him. I feel nothing but rage and hatred as I look at him and recall how much harm he caused me.

He's the reason Lily got shot, he put her in a coma and almost took her life, he put Alyssa in danger without a care in the world, and the fact that he's Catalina's father doesn't outweigh any of it. I try to think about the pain it'll cause her, but when I do, I think about all the pain he's caused me.

"Why?" I ask. It's all I want to know.

"Why?" He scoffs. "Look at what you did to me! To Catalina."

"That was over a year ago!" My voice squeaks. I know that the time that has passed doesn't make things okay, but if he was going to have me killed, he should've been successful by this time.

"And it feels like it was yesterday." He stares me in the eyes, I don't see rage or hatred, just pain, and they remind me so much of Catalina's that I feel like I'm holding a gun up to her.

I swallow and tell myself that no matter who he is, him putting my family in danger is unforgivable. What he did to Lily makes him undeserving of any kind of remorse. I feel my tongue running along my teeth as I keep my jaw clenched and stare at him, with too many emotions to detect. All I know is that I can't let him walk out of here unscathed.

He loved Katrina once. He loved her the way I love Lily and I took the love of his life away from him. Even if he had to love her over a counter once or twice a week when she came by to grab things from the store—he still loved her. He never knew about his children until it was too late and he couldn't talk to her about it because I killed her. I understand that I hurt him, I've hurt a lot of people, and me killing him won't change it just as well as him killing me won't change what I did to Katrina.