Chapter 26 || Chara's diary

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A/N: This is just to fill in between Christmas and New Year. You can skip if you'd like. Btw it's the diary in the bunker.

Hello.

I'm Chara Dreemurr, and I have come across this bunker. I was just walking around the forest and I realized that one of the trees was metallic, I found this lever and pulled it, it opened stairs and I descended into where it led. 

Once inside many strange things were found.

A closet full of knives, old guns, dusty bed, a bunch of drawers, and more. There were also empty notebooks, which I decided to write in them.

The rest of the notebooks, I used them to greet someone who might explore this place.

Why?

Well it turns out there are more rooms.

Two more. The second room, which was hidden by a poster, there are a bunch of cubes that will squish you to death, and I used a little trick. For you see, I'm a ghost. I can turn form ghost to human, but like to stay in my human form, even if being a ghost is kinda cool. Using this power, I passed the walls and had access to the last room. The last one is a lab, and a monster was there, a shapeshifter, after he greeted me by turning into myself. He told about a group of kids. A pair of twins and two teenagers, told me their names are Dipper and Mabel. I heard their names before, they are Mr. Pines' nephew and niece. They'll be coming back to Gravity Falls soon. So, since they went here, they might visit the bunker, I need to let them know this place is now mine.

Yeah, now I'm thinking of this being my private hideout, when I want to stay away from my family.

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The shapeshifter is trying to convince me to set him free. I have had worse, so resisting became a thing for me, but sometimes I can't hold the demon in me when I get mad sometimes.

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Did you know I have Spanish blood?

I can do some flamenco moves that I remember from my childhood. 

Other things from my Spanish blood is that I remember a full recipe of paella and gazpacho.

I love gazpacho. I may like chocolate, but if I had to choose a meal, maybe something good like a fresh bowl of red gazpacho.

I hate bell peppers but I love the fuckin thing so much. It's the only thing that I eat, since I have some kind of eating disorder, not anorexia, but it's just I can't eat.

~-~-~-~-

I also have British blood.

Probably there reason why I like tea.

I don't act all British, I just show my Spanish side more.

But never, ever I have gotten mad and started speaking like an angry Spanish mom.

~-~-~-~-

I'll have to be honest with you.

I had a terrible part of my childhood, from my early days to 9 years old.

When I was just a baby, my mother and father divorced. She neglected me and refused to give me food, I grew up with malnutrition, and when I became 6, mom would beat me up and wanted money for her stupid cigarettes and beer, so mad me work at a factory.

Then she used me as a prostitute for more money, but it didn't work. She blamed me for not getting money for calling me 'unattractive'.

That mentally scarred me, and now I can't stop thinking that I am unattractive.

I still have the cuts on my back she did to me. there was much more, but some were gone, but some stayed and became scars of the past.

Another wound on my body is on my arms from my self-harming.

~-~-~-~-

I don't want to reveal more stuff about my past, but maybe I'll get more confident about talking about it later on...

~-~-~-~-

They're here.

The twins.

I'm scared.

They befriended Frisk. Soon enough they'll meet Azzy then she'll try to make me meet them.

I don't want to.

I'm a terrible monster.

So many sins I've done in the past.

I don't want to meet them. I might get out of control.

I might hurt them.

~-~-~-~-

They found the bunker and found the books, they even found how to pass the second room without crushing to death.

I know this because they left a note knowing that it's them.

The day is getting closer and I'm afraid.

DONT LET HER CONTROL YOU DONT LET HER CONTROL YOU DONT LET HER CONTROL YOU DONT LET HER CONTROL YOU DONT LET HER CONTROL YOU DONT LET HER CONTROL YOU DONT LET HER CONTROL YOU  DONT LET HER CONTROL YOU DONT LET HER CONTROL YOU DONT LET HER CONTROL YOU 

I can handle this.

Just don't stress Chara.

Everything will be alright.

This and that annoying shit in the lab will make me go insane.

 ~-~-~-~-

 I have finally met them, it stressed me out, but I finally made it.

They seem fine.

But will they accept my true self?

~-~-~-~-

HATE gave me a bit of her power.

That means she's feeding on my humanity, but I haven't found any effects of this.

For being a parasite, sometimes her voice reassures me and she isn't that bad. We form some kind of friendship.

NOTE TO SELF: Hide this form her so she won't read this part.

~-~-~-~-

 They have learned the truth. They know everything about me and the monsters.

But they seem to be fine. 

I guess now we're good friends.

~-~-~-~-

We recently revived the souls, and mom and dad have now adopted them. They're our siblings, but like for Frisk, I consider them as friends, and not as close as that. 

Only Asriel is considered like a brother to me.

~-~-~-~-

I have decided to get all the things I've put in this bunker and leave it abandoned, for now, I've been visiting it less and less now that I've met the twins. I'll just take the diaries and stuff that I've put in there.

Goodbye bunker.

It was a kind of fun staying here.

But I can't hide forever.

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