Eyes Closed

45 ; A mothers love

October 10, 2018

I burst out into even more tears as Tzuyu slammed the door to my face as she finally walked away from the doctor's office- away from me and away from the possibility of her pardoning my dad's life.

I dropped to my knees and down to the floor as my body shake due to my unstoppable cries and hard breathing. I felt strong grips on both my shoulders as the doctor, who witnessed everything, pulled me to stand and dragged me softly on one of his cushioned chairs making me sit.

"Here, water, drink up," he softly muttered after he returned from getting a bottled water in one of his cabinets, opening it up for me.

I shook my head as my breathing became uneven and my head started spinning while my surroundings started becoming black. And before I knew it, I blacked out off consciousness.

I dreamed of a weird dream.

There was a woman, a beautiful one, but I couldn't quite put my fingers on it. She looked familiar but I couldn't recognize her face. It was like knowing what you've wanted all along but you cannot remember what that thing is. It was confusing. She was smiling at me, we were even laughing together but all I could see was her upper extremities and nothing else.

My vision then zoomed out, seeing her background. Trees behind her and a large lake with a boat in the middle of the waters. Her hands were wrapped around my arms as she tries to pull me up happily. " Come on, baby ," a familiar voice said. I knew the woman with me was the one who said it, but I cannot see her lips moving. " Our children are waiting for us ," she continued, pointing at the small dock south of the lake where we are.

Looking at the dock, I see children and one stood out the most. " Mommy," the little lady in pink dress whined loudly. " You said we'll be riding the boat, come on you lazy peanut,"

The woman beside me chuckled, " you promised them that we'll be fishing today, remember? "

I smiled back at her and then pouted as she pulled me to where the children are. " Look at me," I whined, looking at my large tummy, "I'm pregnant, what if the boat sink because of my weight? "

She smiled as she pulled me into a side hug. I then started recognizing who she was. " It won't sink, Sanny, " she kissed the side of my head. "You're not even that heavy. You look perfectly fine, "

Sanny. Only one person calls me Sanny.

I looked at the face of the woman who seemed to be the other parent of my children. I felt happiness burst out in my chest as I realize that it was Tzuyu, a different version of her- she was happier, livelier, younger and even lovingly protective. The love radiated off of her.

" I love you ," she said. But before I can even reciprocate her words, I gained consciousness.

I sat up, only for my head to start spinning again. "Oh, you're finally awake," a woman in her mid-40s spoke. "I am nurse Amelis, you've been passed out for almost an hour darling,"

I squinted my eyes, "where am I?" I asked as I lay back down.

"Dr. Sunh asked you to be transferred here when you passed out," she smiled, checking on some papers. "You're in your dad's private room, he was sent to the OR twenty minutes ago,"

"OR? But I thought my father's operation was cancelled?" I sat up again, ignoring the pain in my head.

"Fortunately the daughter of the heart donor was finally convinced,"

"Wait what? Where is she? Where's my mom?"

"They were in here a few minutes before you woke up, I think they're seated outside,"

I quickly jumped off the bed and out the room. There were seats lined up outside of the hallway and I spotted my mom hugging a crying Tzuyu in front of the room.

My mom looked up with a sad smile on my face and mouthed the words: I talked to her. She'll be fine.

I nodded silently as I slowly approached Tzuyu's other side. I softly grabbed her from my mom as I hugged her. She looked up with puffy red eyes, looking at me like the whole world had just collapsed on her. "Sanny," she mumbled.

I breathed out as she pulled away, caressing her cheeks with my hands. "Thank you, Tzuyu," I whispered as she nodded sadly. I didn't have to tell her what I was thanking her for, she had understood what I was talking about.

"I- I have to leave," she croaked out, standing up.

"No, wait," I held her left arm to prevent her from walking away. "I'll come with you, just... let me talk to my mom first, okay?"

She looked down and then nodded again as she sat on the seat. I then pulled my mom inside my dad's room with the door slightly opened as we started talking.

"How come you had managed to convince Tzuyu to let dad's surgery go on?" I asked, confused. "What happened?

"The nurse told me that Dr. Sung was looking for me. The moment I was about to enter his office was when Tzuyu walked out of there. I grabbed her attention and I tried to talk to her," she shook her head, "that woman is really stubborn," she chuckled. "When she calmed down, I told her about her mom's real situation including your dad's situation. But I let her choose," she paused. "either she'll fully let go of her mom or fight for her,"

Tears started streaming down my face as my mom basically told me how she tried to let Tzuyu understand of what really matters. She basically became a mom to Tzuyu all those minutes that they were talking and that she's willing to be Tzuyu's second mom no matter what decision she made. She let Tzuyu rant out and my mom just listened to her. She showed Tzuyu what a mother's love is. I didn't even know how she let Tzuyu think straight especially that our situation is messy.

"Is it okay for me to come with Tzuyu?" I asked my mom after she explained everything to me.

"Where?"

"Maybe let her stay at home? Cuddle with her? Just make her feel better,"

My mom smiled lightly. "Do that, honey, she needs it,"

"What about dad?"

"I'll call you once his operation is done," she said. "Go on, take care of Tzuyu, I'll look after your sister and father,"

I nodded to my mom after thanking her. I then kissed her cheeks and said my goodbye.

I went outside followed by my mom to see Tzuyu still sitting on the chair as she stare at the white tiles below her. I silently approached her, tapping her shoulder lightly. "Are you ready to go?" I asked softly.

She nodded, standing up as she pulled me into a light embrace. "Your dad will be fine," she mumbled, pulling away.

She then proceeded to hug my mom and then tears started pouring out of her eyes as they talked quietly among themselves.

Minutes later, they both pulled away. My mom kissing Tzuyu's head and Tzuyu reciprocating it by kissing my mom's cheek. Tzuyu then faced me as she let out a small smile, walking towards me and intertwining our hands.

She smiled one last time at my mom before dragging me out of the hallway and out the hospital. "We'll be fine, Sanny," she mumbled, wrapping her arms around me.