Red vs Blue (Male OC Insert) [Being heavily overhauled]

Season 4 Episode 71: You Keep Using That Word

Fade in to Church admiring the purple thing, the Warthog, and Sheila

Church: Look at this Sheila, this, is a thing, of beauty, what I have here. I am amazed.

Sheila: Whatever.

Church: We have got every, single vehicle in this canyon. We are unstoppable. This is- I have my own fleet. I have my own fleet of cars.

Sheila: Three vehicles and only one guy to drive them. Big deal.

Church: No the important thing is that they, don't have any vehicles to ...hey is there a problem here?

Sheila: Problem? Why would there be a problem?

Church: Ah-sh-e-a, I don't know. You just seem uh, ...you know... agitated.

Sheila: You think I'm agitated.

Church: Well uh- I- I didn't mean, well I- I didn't mean-

Sheila: No, it was your word. Agitated. You said "You sure seem agitated, Sheila." So I guess that means I'm agitated. Don't I seem agitated, Church?

Church: I'm just, I'm just saying you seem a little, upset.

Sheila: Oh- so now I'm upset. Which is it Church, am I agitated or am I upset?

Church: I don't, I mean I don't really- I could, I could go get a dictionary.

Sheila: Why would I be upset?

Church: Uh, I don't-

Sheila: Well, would you be upset if I got a bunch more blue guys to come hang around and help me?

Church: Well actually there, are, three other guys on the squad.

Sheila: Exactly. This isn't a parking lot Church, it's a team, a family. Are we just supposed to forget everything we've been through?

Church: Right, including the time that you killed me.

Sheila: How about, if I suddenly decided, I wasn't the Blue team's tank? What if today, I'm feeling just a little bit red. I could even go and join Ghost.

Church: They're just cars, Sheila.

Sheila: I'm going to pretend that I didn't hear that.

Church: Hey is there like a... jealousy, setting, somewhere on you that I can you know, ...turn off?

Sheila: Oh you'd like that, wouldn't you?

Cut to the Alien holding the Andy during the battle

Andy:    Tucker, use the key and open the gate!

Tucker: Key, what key, I don't have a key!

Trut'aik: Wharrh.

Caption: <The sword, you iniodic human>

Andy:    Your sword! Use the sword!

Tucker: Oh God, the sword is a key? Just when I thought this couldn't get any lamer.

Tucker strikes the hologram with the key, opening the gate to reveal a vehicle

Tucker: What is that thing?

Trut'aik: Blarg blarg, blarg blarrgh!

Caption: <There's the ship!>

Andy:    The ship!? What ship? No-one told me about a ship! Hey, come back here ya stink nugget!

Trut'aik jumps in the ship and takes off Ghost jumps off the base and sees Trut'aik flying away.

Ghost: where the fuck is he going?!