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-Jeongin's POV-

I screamed while waking up from my nightmare. after the kidnapping, I keep getting nightmares about it... and I hate that... I want to forget it so badly, but it keeps popping in my mind and it's driving me crazy... "Jeongin? is everything alright?" I heard my mom entering my room. "M-Mom I-I... it's just a nightmare" I haven't told my parents about what happened, and I don't think I will ever tell them... I'd rather keep it to myself... "baby, it's okay" she hugged me and so just started to cry in her arms. she was rubbing my back, trying to calm me down.

but I? I was crying like a mess... it keeps happening... "Innie, it's okay... it was just a nightmare" she said with a soft and calm voice, trying to calm me down. I wish it was only a nightmare... "i-it was s-so scary I-" "shh, it's okay, I promise it's okay" she pulled me out of the hug and gave me a kiss on my forehead. "try to go back to sleep sweetheart, and if you get a nightmare again, just come to me, okay?" I looked into her eyes and nodded. "good night sweetheart" she smiled a little bit and then left me in my room.

I lied down and let out a shaky sigh. those nightmares always feel so real... it just scares me... I wonder when they're going away...

~~~~~

"good morning Jeongin" I heard the familiar voice of Bora. "morning" I said while staring at the floor. "is everything alright? you seem a little sad" she frowned a little. "No I'm totally okay" I lied and smiled. I felt like a mess. "Jisoo broke up with Seungmin, she found out about you guys... Seungmin seems a little sad, because he knows he broke her heart" she also sounded a little sad. "to be honest, Jisoo is a sweetheart, she deserved better than this" "says the one who's dating him" I playfully hit her. "I meant she didn't deserve that heartbreak"

"I know~ I'm just messing around Innie, class is about to start, let's go" I had PE, and she had France class. "good luck" she said with a bright smile before leaving me alone.

~~~~~~~

I kept looking at the other boys who where changing there clothes, meanwhile I was still in my regular clothes. "Jeongin, maybe you should change your clothes" I heard the voice of Seungmin dragging me out of my thoughts. "y-yeah sorry" I slowly started to change my clothes. I always felt uncomfortable with changing clothes with other people, but for PE, we actually don't have a choice.

"he looks so beautiful"

"he looks so innocent, I would love to ruin that"

"so amazing"

"Jeongin? are you okay? you're crying" I heard the worried voice of Seungmin. I didn't even noticed that I was crying. I wiped my tears away. "I-I... I have to use the bathroom." I grabbed my bag and just left. I've never felt like this... I don't feel me... I feel different... I just want to get rid of those thoughts that keep spinning inside of my head...

I went to the bathroom and looked into the mirror. get yourself together Jeongin, it's not that hard. I took a deep breath. get out of my head, just get out! I felt the tears steaming down on my cheeks again... why is it so hard to get something out of my head? "Jeongin is everything alright?" I heard the voice of Seungmin, he was really worried. I wanted to say yes, but I know that he knew that I wasn't okay. "n-no" the older boy pulled me into a hug. "tell me what's wrong, I'm here for you Jeongin" I let out a shaky breath. "i-it keeps popping in-inside of my he-head"

"what do you mean Innie?" he sounded a little confused. he hugged me tighter. "th-those memories..." I barely could speak, I just felt so... numb but also... I felt too many emotions running inside of my body. "baby, what's wrong? what kind of memories?" he asked with a comforting voice while rubbing my back. "th-those people... who... who hurt me..." I hoped he understood what I told him... he looked at me into my eyes. I could read his face that he felt sorry and sad... but also angry... angry at those people who hurt me.

"I'm sorry I couldn't save you... if I had saved your you wouldn't-" I cut him off. "you couldn't do anything Min, they were stronger than you" I heard the older sighing. "but I should've protected you, I'm your boyfriend Jeongin, it's all my fault that they-" I cut him off. "it wasn't your fault Hyung, stop blaming yourself" he didn't say anything back, he just sighed and gave me a peck on my forehead. "I hope everything will be like the past... a happy life without any problems."

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A/N: I have nothing to say tbh so...

yeet

jk jk I also wanna say sorry for not uploading for a while I'm just really busy with learning new choreographies and also with shopping bc summer break-

anyways...

Question of the chapter: Song of the year 2020?

A: to be honest, either Kick It by NCT 127, wannabe by itzy and Left and Right by seventeen(my biggest choice is Left and Right by seventeen and I hope they will win)

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