Code Red || lee felix

25

Felix

"Are you certain boy? That you can escape this life?" His face was smeared of fresh blood—he just killed someone right fucking in front of me.

He knew well I failed the mission. I had to escape or I'll die in a crossfire.

"Monster." I yelled at my own father's face. How could he kill one of the gardeners of the mansion. He was even grandfather's closest servant. The blood lust he's having can kill everyone in the household
in minutes.

"I'll come for you.. remember that Felix Ethan Lee Rosenberg!"

"Felix? Felix wake up!"

I woke up teary-eyed and lost. Claire knelt in front of me with a concerned look on her face. She cupped my face with her cold hands. "What's wrong?" She asks softly.

"I just.. had a bad dream."

She lets go of my face and stands up. I was confused of the action so I sat up and followed her to the kitchen. "A glass of water would help?" She took out a glass and poured some water. I ruffled my hair and checked the time, it was 2am. Why is she awake at this hour? She passed me the glass and I took it.

"Where's Chan hyung?" I asked as I leaned by the counter.

"He's out. Probably with Changbin." She pulled a chair and sat. "I just saw you shivering and you looked like you were pain so I had to wake you up." She leans by the table.

"Oh? I fell asleep." I remember that I was waiting for Chan to finish upstairs and suddenly I dozed off. Maybe he wanted me to rest. "Chan texted me before he left to check over you here which was weird." She explained that Chan did intentionally left me here to clear things off my mind. They're probably advancing to the mission without me.

"You okay? You look better than earlier." She goes back to her worried mode.

I sighed and decided to sit beside her. "I just had a nightmare.. about my dad." I knew it was better to talk to Claire. She was always there to listen even though she doesn't know most of the details.

"My dad wasn't the best person for me. He was a monster." Hatred burned me. I hate my father, I hate the fact that I am his son. The murderous blood flowing through my veins disgusts me. "It was a bad memory, haunting me every night. He's coming for me when I know he won't because the agencies are holding him captive." SM and JYP agreed on doubling the security since a top 2 criminal.

"He was one horrifying hitman—a monster like I said. He was also a horrifying mentor. I had no choice but to follow his will because my grandfather was the boss at that time." Remembering grandfather just made it heavier for me to talk about that I ended up choking on my saliva. "I even asked grandfather.. that I won't participate in any mafia family activities."

"Felix, slow down." Claire held my hand, I noticed that I was shaking.

"He agreed and I was happy about it. I should've returned home.. in Seoul 2 years ago."

"But he died at an untimely event. Father became the boss and my hands were tied. I didn't want to kill —I hate killing." I buried my face onto my hands. I started to sniff until I fully sobbed my way. It was so hard to swallow the fact people hated me because of what happened.

I felt warmth, her arms wrapped around me. "Just cry. It's okay. You shouldn't have bottled your feelings for that long, Felix." She said it sweetly.

"I don't have someone to talk about it. I don't wanna suck Chan hyung's energy because he's also busy and-"

"You have me—You have me as always, Lix." Those words just made me cry even more. I embraced her back, "T-Thanks Claire."

"Don't hesitate on calling me if you need help, okay? I'm your best friend after all." She gently rubs my back as I tried to stop crying. It felt good after months, I never realized crying can be relieving.

—Update. just filling in.  hihi