4. Change

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How I ended up in the gang? I started smoking weed and buying it from one guy

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How I ended up in the gang? I started smoking weed and buying it from one guy. He asked me if I would like to sell and I agreed. I needed money. My dad stops giving it to me, saying that if I didn't want to follow his steps, then I should manage. To be honest I was surprised he didn't kick me out.

So, I had no choice. I said yes. I wasn't a rich kid anymore. I was a kid with a famous, busy, and rich father, but I didn't want to follow his steps, so... Yeah, I didn't change my mind even if he took away all of my credit cards and cash.

I started smoking weed more and more and all money I was getting was spent on it. Like a never-ending circle. I tried to stop it but ended up drinking. I needed some distraction. Something to keep me calm before I go to sleep. To help me not to think in a dark room with no lights. Something to help me not to pay attention when my dad was insulting me. To not break. And it helped. But that calmness didn't last long. Just as I woke up in the morning there would be a pain in my chest. I wasn't sure how to stop it. If there was something that could stop it.

I got a tattoo. The needle carving in my skin felt good. Calm. I liked it. And soon my whole body was covered with ink. I don't even know which tattoos I have. I would get everything I liked. Roses, feathers, some quotes. One of my favorites is and one thing that I love and hate the most is people always change but the memories don't on my left arm. This was my first tattoo, actually. I got it after listening to the song called Hello by Conor Maynard. I wanted to get a tattoo with the last quote of the song, but I fell in love with this one. Because I changed. But I still remember everything. I still had emotions. Even though I didn't want them. And the thing I liked was that day by day I cared less and less. I hope that one day I won't care at all.

Star and its darkness (Book 1 in the Darkness&Brightness series)Where stories live. Discover now