Star and its darkness (Book 1 in the Darkness&Brightness series)

35. Fight

I cannot believe he did that. No, I cannot believe I did not stop that. I did not save her. I failed. I hate myself for that.

"I hate you! You are just like dad!", I shout, knowing that it is going to piss him off.

"I'm not! I'm not!" He hits my face. I return the punch, catching him off guard.

I cannot stop myself. I want to hit him so bad. To make him pay for what he did. He hits me in the neck and then chest, just to come back to my face. I can feel cold blood coming down my face, but I do not care.

I know that she is scared of blood. I remember several panic attacks she had and how hard it was for her to calm down. She cleared our wounds and he raped her? I punch him again. Then again and again. I use my right leg to punch his face and let him fall onto the ground. Then I continue punching him, straddling him. He tries to cover his face with hands which are secured in red gloves but fails.

"You motherfucker!" I am not a person who curses, and the profanity feels strange rolling out of my tongue, but I cannot stop myself.

I feel venom toward him. Toward my brother. My twin brother. "How could you! You are like our father! You should die!"

Normally, I would regret saying that, but right now it feels good. If he died that day, Emily would be alive. Stella would not be hurt and scared of him. How did not I see that? That morning when she looked so fragile and broken, that was it. That night he raped her. And I saw the pain in her eyes, but even though I saw I did not pay attention. Why? Because I am an idiot.

Christopher pushes me on the ground, swapping places. Now he is straddling me and throwing punches at my already bloody face. Maybe I deserve to be hit. I let her down. I let another girl become Christopher's victim. It is all my fault.

"Everyone is trying to steal her from me! She's mine! You hear me? Mine!"

He thinks women are objects and he can possess them. He is wrong.

"She is not a thing! You can' have her! You can't!", I scream, trying to be louder than the crew.

I almost forgot that there are people here. That this is illegal. But being a drug dealer is illegal, too. But unfortunately, it is not my choice. I am actually forced to do it. Why we cannot have a normal life with normal parents? Maybe then Christopher would not become a monster. A devil. I cannot recognize him. He is not that kid who fought for life while his dad was beating him. No, he is now that man who beats woman, just like our father did to our mom.

I punch him again and again, trying to push him off me.

"You hurt her! You killed Emily! Emily died because of you! It is your fault!"

I can feel the pain that hasn't healed in my chest. It tightens and I let my guard down allowing him to punche me again.

"No!" His fist collides with my face.