The Choice Of Us

Hearing The Song

TIANA

Forgiveness

Forgiveness

I found myself sinking away too often ask myself if as of late I had done that. One thing I appreciated about Monica was her ability to find a piece of her old self, despite what happened. The more time I spent with her, the more I saw the strength grow within her and I felt compelled to be around her.

And I felt compelled to know if forgiving the man who took my brother would lead me to stop blocking the good that was meant for me, even if it came in the shape and form of Luis.

Whose presence seemed to prohibit me from having that dream. It didn't go unnoticed to me that the only time I managed to get an adequate amount of sleep was in his arms.

The stubborn part of me would have repudiated such a claim, but ever since Monica's observation I had to come to terms with the fact I had grown somewhat fond of him. That I was growing more accustomed to hearing his baritone. Felt myself paying closer attention to the curve of his smile nearly tripping into the blinding light behind it.

And as ashamed as I was to admit it, I often found myself sitting at my desk at work, caught up in a daydream tracing circles on my arms pretending that it was his touch, his fingers grazing my skin. The flutters in my belly would increase anytime he called, I ignored some of them. So given the fact I had been kind of avoiding him, caffeine had become my aid in staying awake.

But avoiding him wouldn't stop the flutters.

So imagine how I felt when I found him sitting on the steps just outside my door when I returned from work. It grew increasingly difficult to swallow and I found my legs growing shaky when he smiled at me.

Get it together.

"You here to terrorize me again?"

He stood up, height towering over me demanding all my attention to not stray from him," Come on!" he whined sounding more like a child making me chuckle," I waited the whole week. Don't I get points for being respectful of your schedule?"

"Maybe," I replied feigning disinterest to irk him.

"So stubborn," he shook his head biting his lip," I'll ignore that little jab."

"You giving up?" I asked in disbelief to see his mind turning behind the smoky grey screen.

"Nah. . ." he grinned widely moving to stand a lot closer to me, causing any resistance I had managed to harbour against him to tremor when he said," giving up is the last thing I'd do with you."

***

The music played in the background despite the pitter-patter of the rain drumming on the car as we sat on either side. I was doing my best to keep my eyes trained on the wet road ahead of us. Despite the fact I'd mostly be laid out on my couch, I chose to take him up on his offer to leave the confinement of my space.

And this time I hadn't put up much of a fight either.

"Where are you taking me this time?" I shifted taking the chance against my better judgement to look at him and grow anxious again under the pressures of his glances. He kept his eyes focused on the road, but the way his lips lifted revealed a dimple on his cheek that I never noticed after all this time.

Truth be told, there were a lot of things that as of late I had begun to take more notice in concerning his features. Like the fact he had a small, faint scar just on the side of his neck that my fingers had discovered the other night or the way his eyes crinkled when he laughed.

"Telling you spoils the fun in all this."

"You sound exactly like Frank," I chuckled only to gasp when I realized the slip up.