He's Inevitable || N.H.

P R O L O G U E

in·ev·i·ta·ble

adj. Impossible to avoid or prevent; certain to happen.

If his face were ever to appear next to a definition in the dictionary, it would be next to this word. This word, this simple five-syllable adjective has managed to get me through the last eight years of my life with my heart still intact. When I was nine my father taught me the meaning of this word, this bloody word, and I can't help but feel that he is partly to blame for my undoing. For if he had not have taught me this word, my mind would not have immediately linked it to him. See, it's like learning by association, to me the word inevitable immediately recalls his arms around me, his thick voice over the phone soothing me, his face lighting up when he sees me running towards him. So if his face were every to appear next to a definition, it would most certainly be this one. It would be this word next to his absurdly handsome and rugged face.

Yet, as far as definitions go, he has changed every single one for me. Love, destiny, fate, promise, inevitable. Every word I can associate in some way with him. He has turned every aspect of my life into a mess that I am unable to cope with, and he has not even shown his face once in England for the past eight years. He has managed to take with him my first I love you, my first heartbreak, and my first true source of happiness. He was in every way the only person I had ever needed, and as I look back at the life I have led so far, at nineteen I believe that now more than ever, I love him with every fiber of my soul.

But then of course, loving someone like him would never bring any good. When you fall in love with a man who is sixteen years your senior, you relinquish any and all rights to a normal and stable life. When you fall in love with a man who has held you in his arms when you were sick and has smiled every time you drew him a picture, you accept the fact the love you have within in you will forever be unrequited and will never see the light of day. When you fall in love with your father's best mate, you don't get to imagine that you will get a happy ending with him. When you fall in love with a man who has seen you grow up, only to leave to lead his own life, you accept the fact that the love he has for you could never be the passionate love you feel for him.

Niall James Horan may be the unrequited love that will never come to be, he may be the one person I may keep coming back to knowing the outcome. But these eight years that have taught me that inevitability does exist, love never falters, and that without a doubt a heart can remain unscathed, even when it's traveled such a far distance for so long. Even if he were never to come back, I know that wherever he goes, my heart goes along with him. And even if he doesn't know it, maybe one day he will. It's inevitable after all, isn't it?