Is He Capable Of Love? (Y/N x Draco)

Aftermath.

Y/N POV:

I don't know when I stopped screaming and crying, but I did. Everything became a quick blur and I found myself sat in Hagrid's shack. My eyes stinging from the tears but it didn't bother me. Clenching onto I think my 3rd or 4th hot chocolate the heat from the cup sent warm shivers throughout my body but I didn't move. A huge blanket wrapped around my shoulders that smelt like wet dog. I'm not really surprised though, Fang likes to sleep on everything. My body is stuck with my knees curled up to my chest. my eyes haven't moved off the shack door since I arrived. I do feel bad for Hagrid though, He's made me so many hot chocolates and not once did I take a sip of any. He would quickly make me a new one when he saw that my cup had gone cold.

How long has it been now? 2 hours? 3? Hagrid tried speaking to me a couple of times but I figured he just gave up after my 3rd cup of hot chocolate. I can see him in the corner of my eye drinking something, watching me. I don't know what to do, I obviously can't stay here all night and it's about to become night-fall. But I can't bring to move my body, I'm still in shock. I'm also pretty sure they're going to pay respects to Cedric's death this evening at dinner and I probably have to be there.

There's a decoration hanging on Hagrid's door that says 'Just because today hasn't gone as planned, doesn't mean that tomorrow won't' I have that quote memorised into my brain. Whoever wrote it is full of shit. Today is shit but tomorrow will be even worse, has that thing ever heard of grief? A huge gust of air escapes my nose as I sigh in annoyance. Hagrid looks up in a panicked state. That sigh had been the first notice of movement since I fell silent hours ago.

"What is it?" Hagrid quickly struts over trying to figure out what's wrong. "New hot chocolate? Need another blanket? I can call Harry and the other two down if you ne-" He realised his rambling and stopped instantly but with no response he just placed himself next to me. Only then did I realise that I haven't seen anyone since the challenge. The last time I saw Harry was when he was being pulled away in the opposite direction from me by Mr Moody. If I know anything It's that Draco probably got amused by my state. He's a twisted bastard that's for sure.

I stay still, sat staring at the door for what felt like 20 minutes before making another sound. I placed the now cold hot chocolate onto the table and wrapped my weak, tired arms across my legs, leaning my head sideways facing Hagrid on my knees. "D-" I'm so exhausted that I can't form a single word. Hagrid looks at me sympathetically waiting for me to say something more. "D-do I have to go..." I small choked whisper escaped from my lips as I looked up at Hagrid who I'd hope would say no. "I'm sorry flower, It's the right thing to do." He slaps his hands onto his knees and pushes himself up.

As I turn my head back towards the door I watch as Hagrid rolls up his left sleeve looking at the watch on his wrist. "Oh no." He exclaims looking at me in yet another panicked state. "We're late!" He rolls his sleeve back down and gestures me towards the door. A let out a small sigh and hold onto the sides of the blanket wrapping it around me tightly, slowly getting up onto my feet. My knees feeling weak and heavy like huge bags of water, I tremble towards Hagrid as I follow behind him. The fresh, cold air from outside hits my skin making me wrap the blanket around me even tighter.

***

My heart suddenly begins to pound out of my chest. We are just inches away from the great hall and I honestly feel like I shouldn't just walk in last minute. Hagrid throws me one last reassuring smile before placing his huge, gigantic hands on the doors. A sickening feeling rises in my stomach as fear hits my heart. I watch as he slowly pushes the doors open trying his best not to attracted any attention, but alas he does.

"Now students, Please place your hands together as we send a prayer to Mr Cedric Diggor-" The loud creak from the doors paused professor Dumbledore's speech. Everyone's heads spin and lock eyes on me and Hagrid. I pull the blanket closer to my chest, brushing out any remaining hair that had fallen in front of my face. I look up at Hagrid pleading that he takes me away but he just smiles and carries on walking. "I humbly apologise professor, I hadn't realised the time!" I sheepishly walk behind Hagrid with my eyes glued to the floor. I couldn't dare to look up, I knew everyone had their eyes on me, feeling pity.

I stop at an empty seat on the slytherin table and Hagrid turns to me, making sure I sit down okay. He really is such a good person. I tug the corners of my lips upwards trying to convince him that I'm okay and I sit down in-between two random house members. When I finally pick my eyes up of the floor I spot everyone's eyes still on me. I glance over to professor Dumbledore who hasn't taken his eyes off me since I entered. His eye's pleading that he was sorry about what had happened.

"Now that Mrs L/N has finally joined us, may we place our hands together once again, in loving memory." 

I push my weak hands together as Dumbledore speaks highly about Cedric, how clever he was, how loyal, how helpful, how kind. I can't help but feel my heart snap into two clean pieces. My hands no longer placed together but over my mouth and nose as I try to drown out my silent sobs. The cries from other students echoed in the hall which only makes me cry more. Sadness is one thing but when it's over somebody who is no longer with us... The pain is something else.

"The house elf's have prepared today's heart-filling meal with all of Mr Diggory's favourites. Please as you begin to dig in this evening, share your memories of him with each other, laugh and cry because in all the darkness in the world, there is always a little flicker of light."

And with that last statement from Dumbledore the rooms peaceful silence disappeared and students small chatters filled the air. I wipe the tears from my cheeks taking in a deep, shakily breath before raising my head facing the people in front of me. Those cold, grey eyes not once leaving my sight of view. Draco's face looks sickening, like he was going to be sick. His bottom lip almost trembling as he bites it in between his lips. The worry on his face only grew once I made eye contact. I darted my eyes back down onto the empty place on the table. Why does he look so intimidating. 

The chatter soon turned into laughter as people began sharing memories, I heard someone behind me say that they once saw Cedric helping a small rat that got stuck in a drain. A little bit of warmness hit my heart and a small smile tugged at my lips. My eyes still glued to the plate. I notice pale, veiny hand stick out towards me, almost reaching the side of my plate. Those black rings tightly fitting around the fingers I just knew it was Malfoy's. I tilt my head to the side and upwards as Draco begins lightly tapping on the table to get my attention.

The look on his face only makes me feel more sick. I just wanted to cry, to cry to him. The memory of the night of the yule ball flashed back into my mind like it was just yesterday. I wanted that again, for Draco to hold me as I cried. 

What is this feeling? I'm grieving over my deceased boyfriend and the only thing I want in the world right now is to be in Malfoy's arms. Staring into his eyes I clench my fist under the table trying my hardest not to tear up. I didn't want to feel these things towards Draco, not now, this is the worst possible time in the world. I bet Cedric's looking down on me right now thinking about how awful I must be. But then again he did cheat on me, and lied about ending things. Am I now as bad as him? 

I failed to keep the tears in and they softly and slowly fell down my cheeks. I darted my eyes away from Draco trying to contain them but It didn't work. He reached over to me leaning over the table trying to get a hold of me but he wasn't fast enough. I leaned back and stood myself up. I look at him one last time before sprinting out the hall. My steps getting louder and faster the closer I got to the door.