The demanding life of a teenager [Destiel AU]

The explaination, please

Yeah... Well. As I said: I'm so sorry.

That was precisely how Sam found his older brother not much later that evening: In bed, tucked in under his duvet, eyes locked at the ceiling, as if he could find the answers of all his life problems right there. Sam sat calmly down on the edge of the bed, not saying anything, just putting a hand on his brother’s shoulder. His very presence was in itself surprisingly calming.

Normally, Dean would just lie there in silence, or more probably, tell Sam that he was okay and not in need of any comfort. He wasn't the kind of person who suddenly opened up and spilled out all his feeling. Hell, he wasn’t even the kind of person to pout in his bed after a wearying day.

But something was different tonight. Tonight it was as if his mouth was a tap someone had managed to turn on without his permission, and he was simply unable to turn back off. Out of the tap poured the whole story with every single incident from the last week. He rambled on about his and Cas' fight. About how they had planned to meet at the restaurant. How Cas never showed. Everything.

And Sam listened patiently, never once interrupting. Dean never knew how good a listener his brother was, since he had never needed it. Not before now anyway. When Dean was finally done talking, Sam stayed with him and comforted him. And when Dean's mind started making up worst case scenarios about why Cas hadn't showed, Sam still sat there right beside him, being his voice of reason. The only reason Dean didn’t changed his mind and went over to Cas place after all, was that Sam agreed with him it would be a bad idea. 

Sam stayed by his side until Dean sometime during the night was finally done crying and rambling pathetically, and fell sound asleep.

When he woke up the next day, Dean was completely embarrassed over his behaviour from the previous night. He had no idea about what had gotten into him. He was happy Sam had been the only one to witness the incident.

Dean continued calling Cas regularly the next couple of days, but with no result. No answer, no texts, nothing whatsoever. Sam continued trying his best to comfort Dean, and keep his mind off it. He made Dean go outside and play football with him several times, but Dean grew tired of it within minutes and went back to bed, where he continued to stare into the air. He knew he was being overdramatic, but he just couldn’t help himself. He had a bad feeling that something was very wrong. How could an entire weekend pass, without Cas getting out of his house even once? Dean was certain Cas knew he would be at home, waiting for him the whole time.

The smallest of things were enough to make Dean break down. Once he dropped his phone, and instead of picking it up, he just sat down on the floor. When John asked about how the meeting with Cas went, Dean was tempted to lie and say that “Yes, it was very nice. We had a great time”. Instead, he said they had rain checked. It was still a lie, but at least a bit closer to the truth.

When Dean woke up Monday morning, he was euphoric. Sam barely managed to force a slice of bread down his throat, before he was out the door. He drove to Cas' house, as he had done each school day since September, to pick him up. He had been waiting for this moment the entire weekend. He forgot watching the speed limit and almost drove over an old lady because he was so eager to get there. One sentence played on a loop inside his head the whole time. He was finally going to see Cas again.

Dean parked the Impala on the side of the street next to Cas’ house. Cas was usually already outside waiting for him when he got there, but it was not entirely uncommon that Dean arrived first either. Dean turned the ignition off and waited. Dean checked his watch. They had to leave soon, or they would be late for school.

When Cas didn't show up within the next couple of minutes, Dean finally mustered up all his courage and knocked on the door front door. No answer. Typical.