Chapter 20

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Song for Chapter:

Impossible by Shontelle

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"And Cameron and I just broke up"

A sob broke from my lips at the sound of my very words, and Alyssa's face fell immediately. She closed the distance between us with one big step and wrapped me in her arms.

It surprised me just how much I was crying, given that I wasn't usually a cry baby. But it hurt so much-- I couldn't help but feel the wrenching pain in my chest continually as if it would never get better.

I've experienced heartbreak before when my mom died and my dad left, but this was something else. My chest literally hurt like someone thrust their hand in there, twist my heart before yanking it right out.

"What happened? Why did you guys break up? " She asked calmly as she rubbed my back.

"I don't wanna talk about it. " I sniffled in her shoulder.

"You sure? Talking about it can make it better you know"

I pulled away from her embrace and quickly dried my eyes as if the tears were an abomination.

"I'm sorry Lizzy. You're suppose to be happy about being with Alex now. I knew it was bound to happen" I said with a forced smile. If I was being honest, I was actually thrilled for them. But my own sadness shadowed the inner squeal and gushing happening in my soul.

"Hey no it's okay. Don't you worry about us right now. " She assured with nothing but sincerity.

"But-"

"No buts Jameila." She quickly interrupted. "Let's cheer you up"

I used the sleeve of my coat to wipe my tears completely with a few sniffles now and then. I was pretty sure that my makeup was ruined, but luckily it's halloween.

"How? " I asked, wanting nothing more than to feel better.

She tapped her finger on the base of her chin with a thinking look on her face, but the moment her face lit up, I was scared. She had her 'let's get wild' look on her face that didn't seem to change even after the years.

"Alyssa, what ever you're thinking, the answer is no" I gave her a look to show her that I wasn't with whatever suicide plan she had in that mind of hers.

"It'll be fun and it will get your mind off your breakup"

I winced at the very words, hating how official they sounded already. My breakup.

"Okay okay. Whatever to take my mind off things" I quickly ditched my initial caution and agreed in order to keep my grief buried as far as possible.

I didn't work well with sadness, and I was in no position to accept what happened between Cameron and I. I wasn't in denial, I knew he did me wrong. But I did not want to sit all night and think about it and everything else that I could've seen and should've done. I'll do all that tomorrow and whatnot, but now I just wanted to forget.

I really just wanted to forget.

Alyssa squealed loudly and clapped her hands together like a five year old before tugging at the tie of my coat. "First of all, we need to get you out of this thing" She mumbled as I helped her take it off.

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