Search of happiness....

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"Did you asked Cheiya aunty?? You are her favourite. She would definitely -

"No, she won't", Kongpob whines, pummeling the pillow with his fist, cutting Aim mid way. He looks at the ceiling, propping against the headboard, mumbles in a dejected tone," This time, they have no intention of letting go of this marriage topic. What do I do???"

"Kong!", Aim soft vocie breezes over the line, making Kongpob's insides twisting and walls starts to build around him. He knows this tone very well. Aim uses this tone whenever he's intended to say something which he knows Kongpob won't like even a little bit But still, he hums to let the other continue.

"Don't you think you should atleast....give it a try. You don't have to marry but the least you can do is meet him. See if you are compatible with him. If you are comfortable with him??? Something like that?? who knows, you guys might click!! Don't you feel lonely and -"

"Aim......It is not about me getting comfortable with him or anything else...It is just....I want to be something, have an identity apart from being Jennifer and Cheiya Rungaroj's Son, someone's trophy husband or...a mere omega...".

Kongpob feels suffocated at not being able to voice out what actually he wishes to. Because it is pointless. No one will understand, but still he tries to tell his best friend. He is not intending to be someone famous or rich. He just wants to be an individual who doesn't have to be depend on others, only to get disappointed or mocked on or insulted on later on.

"I...I am not wired like you Aim. I..I don't want to bind myself to any relationship, or responsibility. To any promises or vows. I want to live freely. I already have spent a decade or so of my life like this. Being a brother and son. Now an omega. I am not saying that I am regretting choosing my family over my own all that time but...but now every thing is not the same Aim"

Kongpob stops, taking a breather before going any further. Aim has seen him all his life so he has no need to explain what he is talking about.

"Changed how??", Aim coaxes, trying to get a grip on his drifting apart friend. It has been a long time, since Kongpob has opened up to him.

"...when dad left...I knew that I needed to be strong for my mother and her new family and that's what I did. Choosing community college for further study because I wanted to be near them. It was my decision solely. All of those were mine and I am okay with it. Now Joy and Pin are well settled in their life, mother's business is also going well. They all are happy doing what they want. But I..I am not happy"

"Are you jealous of-

"NO WAY!!! Are you crazyyy??? I would never get jealous of my family. I...I just don't want to get married just for the sake of it. Just because I should. For me marriage is a big deal, not just choosing your life partner. So many compromises, adjustments, and sacrifices need to be made for a marriage to work. I am not ready for it. And am afraid I would never be", Kongpob ends in a little voice.

" you mean you want to stay all alone your whole life???", Aim wondered.

"May be.......

"I won't lie and say that I completely understands you. But I am with you. What are you going to do then???", Aim utters in his most sincere voice. He kind of get from where Kongpob is coming from. His best friend had a life in which his role had been programmed from the very beginning.

Since school days, Kongpob had been target of all bullies for several reasons. First was him being the first born in Suthalik clan, next for his small and weak frame. Kongpob had been a very late bloomer. It was only after his 14th birthday, Konpgob height spurted and his physique developed to what it is today. Another thing, which made Kongpob's life a living hell all through senior high, it was his parents ugly divorce and then his alpha of mother getting married to an omega of same gender. To say that it was a scandal is like calling an ocean by name of a pond. It was full chaos at that time.

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