How Could You

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⚠️t.w.⚠️ mentions of cheating and drugs.

(4 months later)
"I can't believe your going to college." I said to Skylar.
"Neither can I."
I helped her pack up her bags and her clothes.
"Is that everything?" I asked her.
I handed her the keys to her car.
After helping her put her bags and stuff in her trunk. I gave her a hug.
"I love ya kid. You can always come here if you need a place to stay, okay?"
"Thank you Sophia, but once I graduate I'm gonna get an apartment."
"I'm proud of you. Your parents would be proud of you too."
"Would they?"
"Yes, Sky they would."
She smiled at me and came over and gave me a hug. I kissed her head.
"I'm gonna miss you kiddo."
"I'm gonna miss you too."
"Good luck." I said before she got in her car. I waved as she drove away. She beeped. I went back into the house. Jay had been acting weird the past couple of days and today was no different.
"Hey." I said walking into the house.
"Oh uh hi." He said back to me. He looked like he was rushing to get out the door.
"Skylar just left. The guest room is cleaned up."
"Nice."
"Is everything alright."
"Yeah, why wouldn't it be."
"Just wondering." I said.
"Well the babysitters here already so I'm gonna get going."
"Yeah I gotta get going too."
"Alright well I'll see you later."
"Bye Jay. Love you."
"You too."
That was weird. Every time I've ever told him I loved him he said it back. I didn't think much of it and drove to the firehouse.
"Hey Stella can I talk to you?" I asked as I walked past her.
"Yeah come on."
We went to the bunk room and sat down on one of the beds.
"So what's up?"
"Has Kelly ever not told you he loves you?"
"What do you mean?"
"This morning after Skylar left for college Jay was getting ready to leave I told him I loved him and he said you too."
"No Kellys never done that. Every time i've said I love you he said it back."
"Somethings going on and he's not telling me."
"I'm sure he will."
"House fire, squad 3, engine 51, truck 81, battalion 25, ambulance 61."
"Come on."
We ran towards the rigs.
When we arrived to the fire we saw that the house was engulfed in flames.
A lady ran over to me.
"Ma'am does anyone live in this house?"
"Yes a family of five."
"Alright, please step over there."
"Lieutenant how many people are in there?" Casey asked.
"Family of five."
"Alright, get people off truck and join squad for search and rescue."
"Gallo, Kidd with me. Search and rescue." We followed Kelly and Cruz into the fire.
"You guys take upstairs we got downstairs." Kelly directed.
I nodded and lead Gallo and Kidd upstairs.
"Guys we found a kid." I heard my brothers voice come through the radio.
"Alright we're still looking."
"Fire department call out!"
"Help!" Someone shouted, then I heard banging on the door in front of us.
"There's people in the front room of the house." I said into my radio.
"Alright, we can get the ladder up there."
"No, it's okay. We can get them."
I saw the fire ride around us.
"Come on help me get this door open."
We used the tools we had to get the door open but it just wasn't working.
"All units get out of the building now. The furnace in the basement can only be held off by engine for so long." I heard Casey's voice come through the radio.
"Gallo, Kidd, get out! Now!"
"I'm not leaving you!"
"Neither am I!"
"That's an order go!" They both hesitated and but then they left.
I kept working at the door.
"Halstead let's go! Get out of there!" I heard threw my radio.
"I almost got it!" I said back. The second I got through the door the furnace busted. I went flying into a wall.
"Halstead! Report!"
"I'm good." I said into my radio.
"How about the victims?"
I went over to the four people laying on the ground. One of them a little girl. I checked all their pulses. Not one single pulse was there.
"No! Damnit!" I felt tears start to well in my eyes.
"None of them have a pulse." I said into the radio.
"Alright, there's a ladder on the window, get out of the building before it collapses." I nodded to myself and climbed down the ladder.
The drive back to the firehouse was super quiet.
"Hey Halstead, Casey's looking for you."
"Thanks Ritter." He nodded and I went to the chiefs office.
"You wanted to see me captain?"
"Not me, the commissioner wants to see you. He thinks it's your fault those four people died today."
"Is he wrong?"
"Sophia."
"Tell me what you think please Casey, am I gonna lose my job or not?"
"Well the commissioner can look at it two ways. The first way being that you did everything you could too save those lives. The second way, being he listened to the radio recordings and he heard that you disobeyed a direct order putting yourself and those four lives in danger."
"If you were the commissioner how would you look at it?"
"I would look at it as your fault."
"Alright, I appreciate your input. I'm gonna go see Commissioner Grissom."

After putting on my formal uniform on I drove to Commissioner Grissoms office.

(just incase you don't know what i mean here's a picture of gabby for reference)"The Commissioner will see you know

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(just incase you don't know what i mean here's a picture of gabby for reference)
"The Commissioner will see you know." His assistant told me. I nodded swallowing my breath and went into his office.
"You wanted to see my Commissioner Grissom?"
"I did Lieutenant Halstead."
"Can I ask what about?"
"The call that you were on today."
I nodded.
"You put your life and other firefighters life's at risk today. You are the reason four civilians are dead. If you didn't open that door and let your fellow firefighters get them out through the window they would still be alive."
"I'm sorry, I was doing what I thought was right."
"I understand that, but sometimes not everything we think is right is. I'm sorry to do this Sophia but I have to suspend you without pay until further notice." I nodded as I felt the tears brim my eyes.
"I was really surprised when your brother called me and told me what happened."
"He did what?"
"He called me, if it wasn't for him I wouldn't know."
"I'm sorry again Commissioner."
"So am I Lieutenant. Your dismissed."
I nodded and walked back out to my car.

I drove to the firehouse to get some things out of my locker.
"Hey how did things go?" Gabby asked coming up to me.
"I'm suspended until further notice."
"I'm sorry."
"It's my own fault." I said giving her a small smile. After getting my things from my locker I stopped in Kelly's office.
"Hey what's up?"
"I hope your happy."
"Why?"
"Grissom told me you called him. I'm suspended because of you."
I said before walking out to my car.

I was getting ready to put Shay in her crib when I heard Jay yell my name.
"Upstairs!" I yelled back down.
I saw him come into the door way.
"Can we talk?"
"Yeah hold on let me put her in the crib first she hasn't slept all day."
He nodded and watched me put her down.
I walked out into the hallway and into downstairs into the kitchen with Jay.
"So what did you want to talk about?"
"There's no easy way to say this."
"Say what?"
"Sophia, Hailey kissed me."
I took a step away from him.
"Did you kiss her back?"
"Yes." He said
I felt a single tear run down my face.
"How could you?"
"I'm sorry."
"No your not, your not at all."
I saw his eyes start to glisten with tears.
"I think you should leave. I would, but there's two kids sleeping upstairs and I'm not leaving them. I think you should leave before things get real ugly real fast."
He nodded and I watched him walk out the door. I slid down the wall crying my eyes out.

After going upstairs to my bedroom I called Kelly.
I saw his face appear in the doorway.
"What's the matter? You called me crying?"
"He cheated on me."
"I'm gonna kill him." He said getting ready to walk out the door.
"Kelly wait, please don't leave."
"But Sophia.."
I cut him off.
"Kelly, there's painkillers in the downstairs bathroom. I'm afraid if i'm left alone I'm gonna do something I will regret."
"Alright I won't leave." He came over and sat on my bed pulling me into a hug.
When I woke up this morning I did not expect to lose my job, yet alone my husband.

just so you guys know i'm gonna make jay and sophia have a happy ending so don't go anywhere :)

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