Content With Loneliness

29. First Date

Cassidy’s POV-

I took a deep breath, trying to get my nerves in check before walking into the café. Why was I so nervous right now? John’s a nice guy, I’m sure he’ll understand. He won’t get mad right? I mean it’s not like we really had thing going on…did we?

But then again, I didn’t expect Brian to get so mad when I told him about John and boy was I wrong about that. What if John reacts the same way? Pushing that thought to the back of my head, I took another deep breath and entered the café. I kept the poor guy waiting long enough.

John noticed me as soon as I walked in the door. A smile graced his face as he stood up to greet me. “Hey Cassidy, it’s good to finally see you.”

I returned the smile as I walked into his embrace. “It’s good to see you too John.”

“You got a hot date or something?” He asked, taking in my appearance before we both took a seat.

I was clearly over-dressed for this small little café, wearing a pretty white dress which came to about mid-thigh paired with brown wedges and it was probably obvious that I put a little more effort into my makeup today than usual.

I could feel my cheeks heat up as I laughed nervously. He had no idea how right he was. I did indeed have a very hot date tonight and it wasn’t with him.

Thankfully, he changed the subject before I could try stammering out a response. We went on making small talk before he cleared his throat, looking at me with an intense stare.

“Are you okay? You seem a little…off today.”

“I’m fine.” I tried to assure him.

He didn’t look convinced. “Are you sure? You seem kind of… nervous. Am I making you uncomfortable?” And there was that thing that I truly liked about John. He was incredibly sweet and too considerate of other people’s feelings. It made me feel bad that he thought this was his fault when in reality I was the one that was screwing everything up.

“No, it’s not you.” I sighed. “I just… I need to tell you something.”

“Okay. I’m listening.” He shrugged, leaning back into his seat.

“So um… I’m kind of seeing someone.” I confessed, looking up from my hands to see his reaction. He looked confused.

“Seeing someone as in… how you were seeing me or it’s more serious than that?”

“More serious than that. We’re kind of dating.” Although it certainly wasn’t “kind of dating”. Brian and I were definitely dating and it still felt a little strange for me to say that.

“Oh.” He breathed out, glancing around the café, not letting his eyes land on me.

“I don’t want you to think that I was leading you on while growing feelings for someone else though. It’s not like that.” I said, finally getting him to look at me again. This time with a puzzled expression. “I’ve had feelings for this guy for a while, I was just so scared to admit it and we were fooling around before you and I started talking but then we got into this huge fight and we stopped talking for a while but then we met up the other day and things just…happened.” I nervously rambled it all out in one big breath.

He sat quiet for a moment, letting my words sink in before speaking again. “Well are you happy?”

“Yes.” I answered truthfully.

“Good… And don’t think that I’m upset with you. Honestly, this is kind of a relief. You’re a cool girl, and I like you and everything but it is kind of weird because our parents dated.” He confessed with a shy laugh. I couldn’t help but laugh with him, feeling a huge weight being lifted off my shoulders.