✰ThE bUtTeRfLy FlUtTeRs✰

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Sid

I couldn't believe that Shehnaz had gone ahead and supported Asim and after that I noticed them by the couch, engrossed in an animated conversation that almost gave me the urge to eavesdrop. Though the fact that Asim and Rashami had lost despite their planning gave me immense satisfaction, Shehnaz being disqualified and losing her immunity was definitely not what I'd wanted.

 It actually made me respect her that she took responsibility for her team but this would prove to be toxic for her if she puts her team's welfare before her repeatedly. Ignoring them and the rest of the housemates, I disappeared into the bedroom, taking aspirin for my headache. Shefali perched at the foot of my bed for a while, probably noticing my glare directed at a cheerful Shehnaaz with Asim.

"Don't take it to heart, he doesn't matter," she cooed, stroking my arm in what she assumed to be a soothing gesture. My eyes clouded.

But I wasn't really looking at him. 

I had dozed off during the course of the evening, my eyes felt swollen and heavy. It must be the lack of sleep that had taken a toll on me, or Rashmi must have poisoned my food. Either of the two.

If Rashmi had really poisoned the contents of the already burnt aloo paratha, that would explain the heady sensation and spell of dizziness. It didn't take me enough time to fall into a deep, undisturbed slumber until I felt tingles on courtesy on my arms, courtesy of the soft, velvety touch of an all-too-familiar pair of hands. My first instinct was that I was dreaming but as I felt my arm being shifted with care, my conscious returned and despite wanting to stay awake, I forced open my heavy lids, wanting to see the desired vision before me.

Shehnaz touching me willingly.

But she wasn't perched on my mattress as I had expected but she was still in closer proximity, hauling my arm over to my bed carefully.

I was still not fully conscious of reality but my first instinct was to clutch at her hand tightly.

Shehnaaz.

 Not dreaming, very much next to me.

She was sporting her usual T-shirt and tracks, her face devoid of makeup and yet she looked like a divine being descended from paradise.

She gasped visibly as I strengthened my hold on her hand and I felt overwhelmed.

I was angry that she was shutting me out as well as desperate for her soft touches and innocent parlance, these emotions were jumbled but mostly my temper dominated like always.

I wanted to pull her closer but I was too drained to do so. I swallowed against my dry mouth. 

Taking a deep breath, I managed to talk.

You better come back to our bed before I dump you over here myself.

You confuse me beyond rationale, Shehnaz. I don't want to feel so much.

Do you really love me as you said you did? If that's true, how are you so happy without me?

Bloody hell, just talk to me like you always do!

Instead of the above alternatives that were running in my mind, I managed to rasp, " I love you."

There was no way she heard me because I had mumbled it under my breath because of my lack of energy and I wasn't wearing my mike either.

"Kya?" She demanded.

Tujhe pyaar kar ke kya milega mujhe Shehnaaz. Kuch bhi toh nahi.

The very realisation hurt me so much, a routine for the past few days that I wanted to hurt her too.

"Maine bola haath hatao."

Shehnaaz raised her eyebrows amusedly and held up our hands for me to see. I was the one holding it firmly.

"Jagaya mujhe abhi tune. Meri neendh karab kar di, thanks huh," I mumbled.

Toh sula do mujhe.

She frowned saying nothing and I realised that her attention was no longer on my words. Her fingers brushed my palm and I said nothing. She sat up with a jerk and placed a palm against my forehead.

"Tum toh bimaar ho."

Her alarmed gasp of realisation caught the attention of Rashami whose head snapped to face me. Most of the others were thankfully asleep. 

"Rashami pulled herself up and examined my wrists, "Uthna nahi, par he is too warm. Yeh ek ya do din mey theek ho jayega."

"Dikhao," Kashmera pushed past her and peered down at me as if I were some artefact in the museum.

I ignored the chaos around me as my mattress dipped, Shehnaaz had taken a seat next to me and her thigh brushed mine unconsciously. She placed the back of her palm on my forehead again and I closed my eyes as if I were merely exhausted but mostly because I wanted to savour the feel of her touch. It slid down to my throat and my adam's apple bobbed with emotion.

I pulled my blankets over my head indignantly but I didn't expect her to get up and leave me. I waited for a few moments before turning around and realising that she'd got a warm washcloth for my forehead. She squeezed the cloth soaked in warm water and placed it over my forehead before raising herself from the mattress. 

I mulled over it for a moment before reaching out to clutch her wrist, "Yaha baith," I even patted the place next to me for emphasis.

"Mey tere liye kuch soup vagera banake laathi hu," she said but I shook my head, mouthing for her to just sit next to me.

She wrapped me in her blanket as well and used her dupatta to cover her shoulders and sat next to me, patting me to sleep.

Rashami was standing at the foot of the bed, hands folded, "Kuch chahiye Shehnaz?"

"Nahi Abhi kuch nahi, thanks," I spoke quietly on behalf of both of us and Rashami went back to her bed, pulling the covers over herself.

Mahira and Paras who'd sat up and thrown suggestions for home remedies during the commotion were now arranging their pillows on the side. Mahira enquired after me once before settling down.

Shehnaaz combed her fingers through my hair and I relaxed, closing my eyes in surrender. I placed my arm over her lap so that I would know when she leaves.

Breathing in deeply, I decided to continue my nap and after a few moments, the washcloth was stripped off my forehead and replaced.

The chamber had become silent after a few moments, it was now only the whirring of the airconditioner accompanied by the soft snores of a few companions. Though I wanted to very much stay awake, I'd fallen asleep and somewhere in the middle of the night, Shehnaaz had also nodded off and rested her head on the headboard only for her to fall dormant.

I pulled her down from her uncomfortable position and wrapped my arms around her, clutching her to my chest and sleep overcame me.

This time the most peaceful one I had had in two weeks.







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