Mine: She's his addiction //A BB13 fanfic (COMPLETED)

✰AcIdItY✰

Sid

The last week into the show.
This was it, I would be back to the real world and the predictable routine of shuttling between the gym,shoots and foreign tours.

I would probably reminiscent the bb house a few months later but presently I just had an urge to go back to my world.

Would I win?

I put my whole effort into every task, there's nothing more I could discern so I  let the nagging doubt recede.

My problem was just the monotone.

Every face that I had befriended now irritated and bored me, except of course the girl who was currently huddled in my arms.

I used to get a kick out of irritating each one of the housemates but after I find their itch factor it is a moot point.

But Shehnaz giving an unpredictable reaction every time sparked my curiosity and amusement. And that morphed into fascination and protectiveness...

Protectiveness became possessiveness and only then I realised that Shehnaaz was not like a bacchi to me. The concern and affection was pointing towards something else.

But at that point of time I had watched Shehnaaz and Paras' interactions keenly.She always went back to him.He was the end point.

Not me.

That hurt so fucking bad but it was too late for me to not feel for her.

Shehnaz had trapped me in her vices. Whether she had feelings for me or not became irrelevant.

I feel so much and I'd tried to cut myself from all the passion and hurt so many times and failed miserably.

I couldn't leave her alone now.  I didn't have it in me to.

I viewed her discretely with a poker face,hoping the cameras will not catch how my eyes softened at her sight.

She huddled closer to me, clutching the hem of my shirt like a little baby.

I felt her soft breaths tickle my neck and sensed a pang deep in my stomach.

You know, like acidity.

I pulled her closer by the waist and relaxed.

I usually had an issue with cuddling and unnecessary touching.

Except when I wanted to make out, of course.

But Shehnaz, she could slap me, smother me with kisses, cradle in my lap and do whatever the heck she wanted to.

I would savour each moment of it.

She was just indescribably precious.

I wanted to just take her away and  hide her from the world.

All to myself...

Which is the most illogical thing that I could think of. I can't force her to be with me all the time.She had a life and a career as well.

It was simple.

I expect her to keep seeing me after the show and to keep reassuring me that she loved me even though I won't be able to say the same.

It was a selfish thought but at the same time the most selfless I had been in the thirty-nine years of my life.

I saw potential for us to be much more but I turned a blind eye to it knowing our thirteen year age gap was insurmountable and she deserved better.

And also the fact that in my possessive rage, I tend to go overboard and lash out at her.

I had almost driven her to the point of hating me last week and the mere thought of it happening again scared me.