The Perfect Storm 2

Chapter 159

My eyes are wide and I feel like I haven't slept at all even though I have very faint memories of myself waking up and remembering that Jace's arm is around me and I'm squeezed behind his arm and his chest. 

I can't sleep even with the darkness outside, the bright moon shines into the room as I try my best to close my eyes, but when I do, all I see is him.

Miles's POV

All I see is her. I don't see the road, I see her instead. I see her for hours and hours until I finally stop outside her mother's house. I knock on the wooden-like door and Angela answers with confusion spread all over her.

"Miles?" She asks and I smile through my smirk.

"Yeah, can I come in?" I ask, looking up at her and she gives me a small smile.

"Of course." She invites me in and closes the door behind us.

"I'll make us some tea." She says and I nod.

"Sure," I tell her as we step inside of the kitchen, she's wearing a nightgown and a long scarf thing around her. Her long dark hair reminds me of Madison and the tears are threatening to fall again, knowing just what I've fucking lost.

"Uh, actually, I just came to stay for a quick minute," I tell her but she shakes her head.

"Oh, don't be silly." She smiles, reminding me too much of Madison. She grabs two teabags and places one in each cup. I get the black cup with golden elks on them while she grabs the very very small white cup.

"I overbought these white cups at the market once and I've regretted spending those two dollars on them ever since." Angela smile and I smirk down at my cup.

"Where did you buy this one?" I ask and she smiles at me.

"This one is Jace's." She replies and I clench my jaw. Of course, it is.

"Can you help me with these in the living room?" She asks and I give her a gentle smile before nodding and picking up both of the cups and carrying them into the living room for us. The small couch is fluffed up and so are the pillows. Angela sits down on one edge and me on the other, our cups are placed on the small coffee table.

"Listen, I'm not . . . I'm not proud of my past," I tell her and she listens, her ears perked up.

"But I'm not a bad guy . . . I'm not the kind of guy you think I am," I tell her.

"And what kind of guy do I think you are?"

"Someone who sleeps with girls while I'm with yours. And I can assure you, Angela, that Madison is the only girl I've been with ever since I . . . we started dating." I explain and she nods with a small smile.

"But I know . . . I know that I can't have her. She's not the girl I belong to . . . she's not the girl that belongs to me. We uh . . . I'm not with her anymore, and I think it's only appropriate that you have this back, and I'd like you to know that I went through a lot of trouble to get this back." I say, looking her in the eye before digging into my pocket and handing her the wedding ring.

"I'm not going to propose to Madison, I never will. But Jace will, and he deserves to be the one this is handed to, not me." I clench my jaw.

"I see." She says the ring in her palm before she presses her fingers down hiding the thing completely, and hiding everything I could have had.

"Are you sure about this? I know Madison cares about you very deeply." Angela tilts her head.

"I'm sure," I tell her, my eyes bloodshot and hurt, hurt with the worst pain. I don't know when the last time I cried was, but right now, It's feeling like I've never stopped.

I 'VE BARELY TAKEN A SIP OF MY TEA but Angela doesn't seem to mind at all.

"Thank you for, uh, thee tea and for inviting me into your home so late," I tell her with a small smirk. She smiles back at me with a small nod as we stand right by the door.

"And uh, I'd like to give you this, before I leave. I don't think anyone else deserves to have this and I need to get rid of it." I tell her, handing her Madison's envelope with only a couple of grand left in it.

"Get yourself a new bathroom, anything," I tell her and she smiles.

"Thank you so very much, Miles." She says in a quiet and firm voice.

"Of course," I say in an almost whisper before opening the door and walking into the light rain and harsh ground. I would never have agreed to anything like this before, but now when I know that Madison will never be okay with me not being able to clean up my past, this is the only option for us. 

I wouldn't trust that ring with anyone else but Jace as much as it pains me to say so, fuck, even think so, but it's true. He's the only one I know that loves her too, he loves her with all of his heart except, he's actually ready for whatever Madison needs, and I'm not. 

I'm far from being ready. I never wanted kids, I never wanted marriage, even when everything was fine with my parents, I hated the idea of it. 

I don't want to be tied down like that, so unable to escape, I need freedom, I need to know I can leave whenever the fuck I want even with Madison. 

I stare at the dark road ahead, the road that leads to uncertainty, the only thing I know is her, and now that part of me has completely disappeared. 

Hope has never been on my side and it's not on my side now either. I had hope when I thought Lace was it, I had hope when I thought Chrissy was it and I had hope when I knew Madison was it. And now, hope has done nothing but crush my heart into unfixable pieces that can only be restored by her hands; the hands I'll never get to feel again.