Angstyboys.inc | sbi angst one shots |

-Deadline-

Art credits go to: _jay.katt_ on Instagram

Requested: no
Character: Technoblade
Setting: his apartment ✌️

Possible triggers for this chapter:
• Loss of motivation
• not really an existential crisis but sort of like it?

A/n: Ayup so this was supposed to be posted last night and I had both chapters done then but I forgot to actually publish them because I am an idiot... also the next chapter is Techno angst too so have fun 😍

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|*~Techno POV (1rst person)~*|

As a well known author who has written not two but three award winning books you'd think I would be a great writer, but you'd be wrong.

The novel I'm working on now is about a boy who lives in a small town and wants to leave, he thought he figured it all out, the dream college, what job he wanted, but it didn't work out, he didn't make it in... he became severely depressed and the rest of the book is spent him trying to get out of his slump and eventually he would, he would then go on to graduate college and get his dream job, happy story the end. But it didn't seem good enough, although it dealt with a serious issue it still felt like a generic book that there is already tons of stories of. I had to make something original, something great, something new maybe even fun. The only problem with that is I've already started writing.

I am supposed to have it done by the end of August and it's already almost May. 4 months sounds like a while but not if your not even halfway through. I've been losing more and more motivation to write because of this project but I'll let so many people down that are waiting for my newest book.

It sounds like I'm bragging but it's the opposite, I just wish I hadn't published that first book sometimes... Writing is my passion and it's made me lots of money but it comes along with expectations and deadlines and I've lost that spark I had before.

Back when I first started writing I remember being so excited to work on it and I put so much thought and care into each and every sentence but now I'm not writing for myself I'm writing for my readers. I'm not writing for myself so I've lost my direction.

It seems like I don't even enjoy the one thing I used to now so what am I supposed to do? Continue writing and be miserable? That seems like the only option because I'm not good at anything else, I'd just be stuck working in retail or at a popular fast food chain. I don't want to be stuck doing something I don't like but that's what I'm doing now anyways.

I realize I've been zoning out and look back up to my computer. The little line still in the middle of my sentence where I stopped. Let's see, let's see.

He pulled at the dry skin on his lips with his teeth, gently tapping his foot on the floor. The clock read 4:36 PM, he had spent all day writing his college essay but there was still only about a third of a paragraph typed out. He was stuck

"He was stuck" That actually seems quite similar to my situation...

A ringing disrupted my thoughts and I realized it was my phone. I get spam callers a lot and I didn't feel like answering it, but it could be something important- and sure enough it was, it was my agent calling me to let me know an update from the publishing company.

(I'm pretty sure he doesn't want people calling him his real name besides his friends so for the phone call he is just going to be referred to as Techno)

"What? An update, this late into it?"

"Yes Techno, I'm afraid the need the book to be done sooner than expected. You see, they are moving location in September and they won't have enough time to finish making copies before their move if you don't get it done sooner."

My eyes widened, now it was due even sooner!?!! How the hell was I supposed to finish it with even less time than before?? Calm down... maybe it's not too bad.

"I- I see, when do they need it done by?" My voice cracking at the end of the sentence didn't help.

"Beginning of July..."

I dropped my phone, hearing it crack, but I didn't pick it up. I could still hear her from the other end but it was almost inaudible.

"Techno? Techno, are you ok? I heard a loud noise. Look I'm sorry, I tried to get them to push the date further but they said if they don't get the book by then they won't be able to get everything ready to move in time."

I sunk to the floor and put my head in my hands. My body shaking and my eyes tearing up. I caught my breath and picked up the phone to see the call had been ended. I then proceeded to throw it as hard as I could, shattering one of my glass windows but I could care less right now.

What the hell am I supposed to do now...

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882 words

Hey! We are almost at 40k reads and I know I will hit it after I publish these so here is a preemptive thank you (:

40k that is crazy... I remember when this book was at 250 reads and I thought that was so cool, but look at it now!

I love and appreciate all of you so much, thank you for reading
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