Just This Much

30: Mind

TW // Contains parts suggesting mental and emotional instability, and anxiety. Please read at your own risk.

    

There were times our minds tend to make illusions for our own benefit. Sometimes we are aware of them, sometimes we are not—or maybe, we chose not to. But to save ourselves from further damage, we let these illusions take over our lives until we eventually become dependent on them.

The downside of it all? When the moment comes and our bubble of make-believe burst, only then will we realize that all this time, it was poisoning our minds. We thought we have been saving ourselves from further damage, but these illusions have already ruined us.

The mind is a body part too, just like any other. If the heart can get complications, if the bones can get broken, if there comes a time the eyes can't function to its full capacity, so is the mind. We tend to ignore its needs because even then, do we create an illusion that we are actually fine. That 'it is all in our mind.'

That's what Ki-Ryeong had been telling himself all this time. As long as he tries to act like everything's normal, as long as he tries to fool himself that he belongs to this world, and as long as he focuses on what he came here for, he will be fine.

That was his illusion.

And without him noticing, his mind is already giving up on its own.

Infamous K-Media News Outlet Unexpectedly Reveals Dating Photos of Global Superstars, Kio (RAVN) and Lilac (K4RMA)!

Ahn Ki-Ryeong of RAVN and Lilac Ayutthaya of K4RMA Photographed Together while Leaving a Fitness Gym in Itaewon

Global Idols Kio (RAVN) and Lilac (K4RMA) Rumored to be Dating After IdolOne Media Released Photos

His grip on the phone tightened to the point that his members—who are watching him—began to worry it would snap in half. They remained silent and Kio can feel their eyes trained solely at him, which made the situation worse. The gazes felt so heavy, they started to suffocate him. As minutes went by, his face grew paler and paler.

"Kio?"

He didn't know who called, and he didn't bother finding out. His hands started to shake and he soon realized he can't look away from the headlines. The words began to blur, the letters began to twist and turn... they started rearranging themselves into a familiar dreadful sentence;

RAVN's Kio Allegedly Dating a Famous Influencer after Intimate Photos got Leaked

Ahn Ki-Ryeong's Dating Scandal with a Social Media Influencer Caused Clamor Among Fans

CCTV Photo of RAVN's Kio and Fashion Blogger in a Tattoo Shop Gets Leaked Leading to Dating Rumors

His breath was caught in his throat, and an audible gasp escaped his trembling lips as he absentmindedly threw the phone across the room. It crashed against the living room's wall, broken pieces flew everywhere making it irreparable.

"No! No, no, no... this can't be... no..." he breathlessly mumbled repeatedly, before he started pacing back and forth.

Yohan immediately went to the restless boy and held his shoulders. "Kio, it's going to be fine. Don't worry," he tried to say in consolation, worry evident in his tone. But to his surprise, fear masked Ki-Ryeong's face instead when he looked back.

"Hyung... hyung, I'm sorry, I'm sorry... this is not- I'm sorry... I won't do it again..."

"Ki-Ryeong—" Asher was about to step closer to him too, but Kio hurriedly met him halfway with tears in his eyes.