Just This Much

03: Much

Her grip on the balcony's banister tightened as she let out a forceful laughter.

"We promised not to joke about this type of stuff, remember?," her voice shook as she internally prayed that her boyfriend was just joking. This must be a prank, right? Maybe Kio was bored, and he's making fun of her again.

"Li..." his voice carried a tinge of exhaustion, and it was like a hard slap on her face.

Has he really fallen out of love, or was he just tired? Tears welled up her eyes and in no time, started falling fast. Her body weakened, like something suddenly weighed her down.

"Come on... why are you— I-I can't understand," she choked out.

"I'm sorry."

She covered her mouth, not letting even one faint sob escape. If not for the handrail, she would've knelt down the balcony's cold tiled floor by now.

"Can we not do this over the phone?," she finally was able to say after calming herself a bit. "Can we at least celebrate our anniversary? This will be my last request, please Ki-Ryeong? Please..."

"Okay, at least for the last time."

The moment she heard those words, she ended the call, afraid that he will change his mind. She stared at her phone's screen, still in disbelief, as it completely blacked out when locked again. She was left in the darkness, with only the far city lights illuminating the space she was in.

As her tears continued to fall, her legs slowly gave up as well. She covered her mouth with both hands this time, she can't let her members hear her pain and get involved. She can't let Jada know that she didn't agree breaking up with him when he said so. She can do this alone because for her, it still isn't too much, she can still endure.

He gave her a chance, that must mean something, right? She can still surprise him on their anniversary and maybe change his mind. Maybe he just got tired, it's not as if he cheated or anything.

It wasn't too much yet.

But it doesn't mean it hurt less, because the pain still left her breathless and clutching her chest. The pain still pushed her to stay out the cold night with only her thin nightdress, crying her heart out but making sure she didn't make any sound. The pain still made her think back and try to figure out what has gone wrong.

The second his words passed over the line of that phone call and into her ears, the already existing cracks of her fragile heart worsened once again. But it's bearable, at least, she insists it still is.

It was a price to pay for taking Kio's love for granted during their first months of being in a relationship. Back then, it must have been hard for him as well, but he didn't let go and understood her.

Now it was her turn to do that.

     

•°.⏳•.°

     

There was a conference call with their boss the next morning and she can't seem to concentrate. She was wearing a pair of specs which was her poor attempt to hide her swollen eyes. The first time Seo-mi noticed it, she lied and said it was because she binge-watched some tragic films the night before. Reiko immediately frowned hearing it, but said nothing.

She knew Jada was suspicious of her made-up excuse, her piercing stare during the meeting was enough proof. The second eldest had always been the most sensitive when it comes to their emotions.

"So always be careful," those were the only words she was able to hear from the CEO, as the girls and even their team, expressed their agreement.

She looked around and found their managers talking about something that was printed on a document. Their styling team on the other hand, stood up from their seats and started to leave one by one. Lastly, she turned to her members and was met by silence. They were looking at her with either worried or inquiring eyes.