The Mimic

38

It had been a few hours since the meltdown in the lab, and whilst y/n had calmed down after a while, she didn't feel okay. But she didn't want Bucky to know about that. She felt like a burden, an unstable mess. It wasn't like her to cry all the time, so why was she breaking down so often? It was embarrassing. Bucky was her rock, there through all the nightmares and shaky moments. But y/n felt as if she was draining him, she'd been crying in his arms more in the past few days than she'd smiled. They were supposed to be there for each other, it wasn't supposed to be one-sided. She was a burden to the whole team. Everything seemed to revolve around her and she hated it. She was supposed to be a normal member of the team, but people still seemed to tread lightly around her. She hated it. 

She needed some air. She needed to get out of the compound for a while. Get away from everyone for a while. She didn't want to sit and watch a movie to forget her problems. She needed space.

So she left. Without another word. Without her suit.

"Hey, does anyone know where y/n is? We were going to watch TV together, but she disappeared." Wanda asked as she stepped into the kitchen where most of the team were situated, trying to figure out what to make for lunch. The whole team looked over with a confused look when they heard Wanda, seeming as unsure as she was. "What do you mean she disappeared?" Bucky asked as he stood up from his chair, a nervous look in his eyes. Wanda shrugged, holding the bowl of popcorn she had a little tighter at the tense situation she'd created. "Well, we were hanging out in my room and she asked if we could watch some sitcoms. So I said yes, and left to get some popcorn, and by the time I got back she was gone. I thought she might've gone to the bathroom, but I checked and they're all empty." Wanda explained with a frown, noticing as Bucky's expression continued to fall. Steve quickly stood up, setting a hand on Bucky's shoulder in attempt to calm his best friend down. "I'm sure she's fine. She's probably gone for a walk around the compound or something. She wouldn't just disappear." Steve reassured, though he was mostly just reassuring himself. Bucky seemed to relax a little, but the look in his eyes was enough to show how worried he was. He opened his mouth to speak again, but Steve cut him off. "Give her an hour. If she doesn't show up in an hour, we'll start looking around the compound, alright? I'm sure y/n's fine." Steve hummed, patting y/n's shoulder as he made him sit back down. But, the whole team was tense. Giving one another nervous looks every now and again. This wasn't like y/n. She was always with someone. Wanda nodded with a frown, turning back around so she could head back to her room, sad that she didn't have anyone to enjoy sitcoms with now. "Wanda." Vision's voice called out as he strolled out of the kitchen, standing in the doorway with a gentle look on his face. "May I join you?" He asked carefully. Wanda smiled warmly at the gentle offer, immediately nodding her head. "Of course you can, Vis."

Y/n ended up sat on one of the tallest towers in the city. Too high up for anyone to spot her, but enough to still be able to watch the bustling city down below. Y/n sat with her feet dangling over the edge, just enjoying the cool breeze of the day against her face. She had her hood up just in case, but it was unlikely anyone was going to see her from this height. Y/n took a deep breath, picking at the skin on her hands as she slipped into her mind, completely lost in thought. 

She replayed the nightmare over and over again. She remembered the way she smiled when the first man was shot, no remorse, nothing. The amount of power she had was immense, and they knew that. But y/n was only young, and they took that to their advantage. Taking control of her before she could destroy them, using her as their perfect asset. Their perfect little puppet. Y/n tensed up, clenching her fists as she looked away from her hands and out at the view, frustrated tears beginning to form in her eyes. She was Hydra's unwilling star pupil. They depended on her to kill with no trace. And now people were depending on her to become one of the Avengers. Natasha told her she was like Steve. Another star pupil. Y/n felt as if she was just moving from one puppet master to another. But this time there were bigger repercussions. At least with Hydra nobody knew her. But now everyone knew her. They looked up to her. What if she messed up?

The sound of footsteps behind her suddenly caused y/n to jump, her whole body tensing up. Nobody should be able to get up here. Who was it? Y/n slowly turned around to look at the mystery person, taking a nervous breath before she did so, preparing to fight. But, a sad smile appearing once she realised who it was, quickly wiping the tears from her face.

"You're lucky I have good attendance, they actually believed I had a family emergency." Peter smiled, dropping his backpack to the floor. He sat down beside y/n, taking two sandwiches out of the plastic bag, handing one out for y/n to take. Y/n smiled, quietly thanking Peter as she took the sandwich. "Well, we're sort of family, right?" Y/n hummed, unwrapping the sandwich slowly. Peter shrugged with a slight laugh, unwrapping his own sandwich with a sigh. "Anyway, what's up? You look like something's bothering you." Peter asked as he took the first bite. Of course he noticed the tears on y/n's face, but he didn't want to completely point it out.