Embracing the Wind (Formentera Series #2)

Chapter 22

"Nanay Sefa! You're not going to do this! You too, Hale! I was the one who killed him! Ako ang makukul—"

"And then what, Yen?! You'll ruin your career?! You'll ruin your life?! Shut up! Ako ang—"

"TUMIGIL NA KAYO!"

Natahimik kami sa malakas na sigaw ni Nanay Sefa. "Tumigil na kayo..." mahinang sambit niya at kinuha ang cellphone sa bulsa ko. "Walang magsasalita. Ako ang sasalo ng lahat."

Napabuntong-hininga ako. I've commited a crime so I should be punished. Hindi ko ito ibubuntong sa ibang tao!

"Nay, tama na—"

"Makinig ka sa akin! Ako na, Chayenne! Tumigil ka..." mariing sambit niya at may dinial sa phone ko.

Napaupo na lang sa sahig si Hale habang ako ay natulala na lang sa taong napatay ko. I knew what I was doing. I knew that I was killing him but I couldn't stop myself because anger was eating me. He made my sister's life a living hell. Sa araw-araw na paghihirap ni Hale, kulang pa ang pagpatay ko sa kanya at wala akong pinagsisisihan.

Now I understand Mang Rando. He hostaged me at the mall because he couldn't bear seeing his daughter in pain. I understand Ice when he almost killed the Director because he loved me... Now I understand them because I was now in their shoes... the only difference between me and them is that I didn't stop myself from hurting someone for the person I love.

Naiintindihan ko na silang dalawa. Lahat gagawin mo para sa taong mahal mo... kahit pa madumihan ng dugo ang mga kamay mo. Mang Rando almost killed me and Ice almost killed that director... ako naman, dahil nakita ko ang kapatid kong ginagahasa... nakapatay ako.

"Ito ba ang pulisya?" Napatingin ako kay Nanay Sefa.

"Mayroong crime scene rito... at ako ang suspek."

Napaupo na lang ako sa kama. Pinunasan ni Nanay Sefa ang handle ng kutsilyo gamit ang panyo at hinawakan 'yon ng kamay niya. Tiyak na sa kanya na ang finger prints na makukuha.

Agad akong pinapunta ni Nanay Sefa sa kwarto pero tulala ako kaya si Hale na ang nagdala sa akin. There are no tears streaming down my face. Tulala na lang ako sa kawalan.

Umupo ako sa kama. Walang laman ang isip ko pero nakakaramdam ako ng kaba at takot.

"Kailan pa?" mahinang tanong ko kay Hale habang nakatulala sa kawalan. "Kailan ka pa niya binababoy?"

Hindi agad siya nakasagot kaya tinignan ko siya. She sobbed. Binasa niya ang labi niya at tumingin sa labas ng bintana.

"It started when I was... 8."

Napakunot ang noo ko kasabay ng pagbagsak ng luha ko. Nanikip ang dibdib ko. Sobrang sikip. Para akong mamamatay.

She smiled. "That was the reason why I didn't like you. I didn't want to be with you because I didn't want him to know you. I was mad at you because you had no idea about my life while you were enjoying your popular life... but it's okay. I was proud of you, Yen... I'm serious." She looked at me and smiled. I was just crying.

She was tortured. Both of her body and soul.

"Lumipad ako pa ibang bansa dahil gusto kong tumakas. I wanted to escape from my nightmares but I couldn't. I was traumatized. Ni hindi ako makalapit sa mga lalaki dahil natatakot ako sa kanila... dahil lang sa ginawa sa akin ng isang lalaki." Napayuko siya habang nakahalukipkip.

Just kill me. I don't want to hear these shits anymore. Just kill me.

"It was true. I really didn't like you before but as time passes by... I just want you to become more successful... pero hindi ko na pinahalata 'yon. I just want to be happy even if I'm just alone. I would never escape from the past. Kahit wala na siya... habang buhay akong dadalawin ng masasakit na alaala, Yen."