Chapter 56

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Kian's POV

I don't know how in the world I reached my condo safely. Everything seems unreal. I can't still absorb what happened.

Why did you do this, Ira?

I don't know what to do next.
Ira didn't prepare me for this.

He chose Jeha in front of me.
I know how close they are. Their bond is unbreakable, but I am his boyfriend. He promised me he would only love me.

It's been days before he messaged me and apologized to me.

I want him still, but I am not ready to face them. It's either Jeha or me, but I know no matter what I do, he will never choose me. As he said before to me, he can't imagine having another bodyguard.

I am sorry, beautiful.
I am not that strong to act like nothing happened because it is still vivid in my head.

When Jeha was suspended for a month, that was the first time that I got insecure because of him. Ira loves him so much. It's like he can't function normally without him.

I shouldn't have trusted that Jeha.
I shouldn't have trusted Ira.

I don't think it will work if we push this. If he kicked Jeha out, maybe I can try. But as long as he is with Ira -- no way. I held my anger for Steph for too long. I can't keep it for Jeha anymore. All I want is to break his face.

~~~~

I can't view his accounts. He blocked me from anything. I decided to create a new account so that I could be updated on him. I know I am hurting myself by doing this. I want this. I want to be hurt more until my heart can't take it anymore and come back to its senses.
I need to move on.

He messaged me again finally.
I don't know, but I am just staring at my phone, waiting for his message even though he blocked me.

I was surprised when he unblocked me on my Twitter.

I can't be soft for him.
He needs to understand that what he did is so wrong. He knows I can never do it to him.

I know the world would not stop because of our breakup. Life will go on, but it will never be the same again.

No matter how I miss Ira so much, I need to be strong. This may sound cliche, but I need to find myself because I am not the same person as I was before anymore. Many changed, and I know I have many shortcomings when it comes to him too.

Ira unblocked me.
He messaged me, and I said mean things to him.
That was a traumatic experience for me. It is still haunting me.
I hate what
Ira did, but I cannot hate Ira himself.

I was so mad, and I hurt him with my words.

"Kian, I am pregnant with your baby. 4 months."
Ira messaged me, and I think my brain stopped working.

Did he say he is pregnant?
Of course, it is mine.

I tried to call his number. I almost forgot that he blocked me. Shit! My heart is beating so fast.
That baby is mine. I don't care about his family; I will take the baby no matter what. I deserve to have him too.

"But I will never allow you to see him ever. I will choose myself and my baby too. Thank you for this. Even if I die giving birth to him, I will never let you have him. Never... And Jeha and me? It's impossible. He knows I can never break up with you. That is the fastest way to save me. I feel sad, but I will never say sorry to you anymore. I love you still. I will always love you no matter what. Thanks for replying though, you saved me from embarrassment. I almost begged to have you back. Don't worry about your career; I am not going to ruin it. I know how important this is to you. I hope you all the best."
Ira added.

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