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Kurt didn't know what he was doing, or why he was being like this. Despite the guilt he felt while watching you walk away, he still found himself in the room of no other than Joan. The room that he used to spend so many nights in, only to sneak out and act like he never did.
He had been lying to you, and despite how much everyone thought he was some sort of sociopath, he actually felt bad. The guilt constantly eating him out (that sounds so wrong) no matter what he was doing. He could literally be blowing his whistle and yelling at a bunch of Shadysiders and then he'd see you walk by and bam the guilty feeling would come again.
What made matters worse was that you didn't even seem as helpless as he felt. You were smiling, actually smiling...but not with him. You were hanging around Alice more, Joking around with Thomas. Kurt had always been good at being discrete when it came to hiding his emotions, especially since you both had started dating.
However, he wasn't the best at hiding the slight clench of his jaw or how his fingers curled up into a fist every time he saw you with someone else. It had gotten so hard to just watch you ignore him, and see you moving on as if your cool about everything. Watching you help the campers, and laugh and play with them.
He had became so sick of it, he wanted to talk to you- needed to talk to you. And As if the world had heard his silent plead, it was announced that today each of the campers and counselors would be paired up for a few camp activities.
As if it was a miracle, you were partners with Kurt. Well actually your partner was Alice, but after a few pills and 5 dollars she was now paired with Cindy. Becoming aware of your new partner you decided to not even participate.
You instead resided in your favorite place at camp. Nature and Science. You liked the snake mostly, it was your job to feed it actually.
Kurt was happy to finally have a chance to talk to you, but after your sudden "disappearance" he was left in a bit of disappointment.
However, he knew you, and he knew if you were trying to avoid him then you'd only be at one place.
"Hey" you hear a few scattered knocks from the wooden door. "Hey" you mumbled, too busy closing the lid so the Snake wouldn't slip out again.
"My dad liked snakes too, huge fan. He liked the um..the um.. Titan snake yeah. The Titan snake-"
"Titanoboa" you corrected him, turning to look at the Sunnyvaler.
"Right! Exactly" he clapped his hand. "Shouldn't you be with everyone else, doing activities" you questioned leaning against the the table, dangerously close to the snake (the lid wasnt on).
"Shouldn't you be doing the same" he retorts. You give him a unimpressed look before turning to look back at the snake. "Alright, I wanted to talk" he confessed.
"Shocking" you muttered, giving a unamused chuckle. "I've been a jerk" you hear from behind you. "Really?" You mock, turning your head a bit to stare at him.
He had a hand in his hair, while the other was placed on his hip. He was nervous. "But could you really blame me" you had actually thought that maybe he'd have a decent apology.
"Excuse me?" You turn to him completely. "You cant possibly be angry at me, because I wasn't ready to tell everyone about us." Kurt gives you a sad look.
"And I understand that but how long were you planning on hiding us? I mean why are you even talking to me? I thought I wasn't that special?!" You snap.
"I- I was lying, because I was scared. I was scared out of my mind, and you know what that feels like. You know how it feels, when everything starts falling apart. How would it look if I Just walked outside and said 'hey I'm dating a shadysider and turns out I'm an asshole who has been too scared to do anything other than pretend to be some bully'." He was being vulnerable, more vulnerable then before. He knew it, you knew it.
"You never told me that" you gave him a glazed stare, trying to grasp onto his words.
"But right now, I'll do it. I'll tell them, if it means you'll stop ignoring me. If it means that you'll just stop..." he trailed off a bit, looking a bit conflicted.
"Looking at me like that..like you hate me" he rubbed at his eye in annoyance feeling the wetness under his thumb. He was crying, he had felt so low, crying in front of you like some baby.
"I'm not really good at caring about what people think" he walked towards you hesitantly "but with you, I really fucking care." He confessed.
You just stayed silent, watching the guy you really liked, basically hand his feelings to you in a gift box. "The longer you stare at me, the more awkward this is gonna get. I miss those times where we could just have meaningless sex and ignore all the weird shit like this." He jokes, you fight back a smile at his words.
He chuckles a bit, seeing your lips twitch. You reached up to wipe his tear "I was selfish" you respond. "I knew you weren't ready for something, and I just kept pushing you." You sigh.
"I guess we're both bad at this huh?" He mutters. "Maybe you're even worse than me" he adds quietly. "You're so full of shit" you laugh shoving him a bit.
"Ouch" he puts a hand on his chest, with a hurt look on his face. He was right, you both were horrible at expressing feelings which was why your relationship was hard in the first place.
After a while the laughter had died down. "Maybe we should go back, I heard whoever wins the most activities gets to take the snake home."
"Liar, they'd never do that" "yeah your right, but it'll be fun. Think about it, a shadysider and a sunnyvaler teaming up." He enthused, placing his arm around your shoulder.
"Yeah sure" you smile at his enthusiasm. You weren't just gonna forgive him that easily but playing a few games did sound fun.
So you took this moment as a chance to ignore all your problems and pretend everything was okay again. While Kurt was gonna ignore all his previous actions and desperately try to cover up the fact that he had a dirty secret of his own. He was gonna enjoy the rest of the day, because he knew that you wouldn't be able to look at him the same tomorrow.
"By the way, when we were have our sentimental moment, your nail poked my eye a bit" he confessed walking you through the door.
