Peter Parker & Tom Holland Imagines

your whatever pt.2

A/N: this is probably going to be the last part—at least for now—but I may come back to it later. If you'd like more to this series let me know, and I'll work on expanding it more!

It's been two days of isolation so far, and to say Tom is driving me nuts would be an understatement. I can barely find a moment's peace without being pestered over something. "What are you watching?" He questions as he munches on some cereal he found in the cupboard yesterday.

"Merlin." I shift around in my stack of pillows and blankets trying to get a little more comfortable. "It's my favorite show, and I always watch it when I need a boost."

The room is quiet for a long moment except for the sound of Merlin arguing with Arthur. Tom stands behind me, still crunching on his cereal, but I can still hear him mumbling about the characters under his breath.

"Dang." He says after Merlin does some particularly clever magic, "He really should be careful if he doesn't want to get caught."

I don't know why, but I find myself creating enough room for him. "You wanna join me?"

"Oh! Um, yeah." He stutters as he carefully sits down next to me leaving as much space between us as possible. I have to bite back a laugh at how nervous he seems right now. His eyes look around every inch of the room to avoid me at all costs.

I focus my gaze back on the screen and try to think of a way to make this less awkward. "I'm sorry for being so rude these past couple days." I mumble.

"I forgive you." He replies without the slightest hesitation. "I know I haven't exactly been helpful will all this."

The tension seems to lessen for a little while, and we're able to just watch the show for a little while. "Woah!" Tom cheers as he stands up and grabs a frame off the bookshelf. "I didn't know Nate knew the Victor Sullivan."

"Yeah," I smile fondly at the picture in his hand, "that was on Sully's sixty-third birthday party. Well, 'party' is a loose term. It wasn't that many people."

"Wait a second. You were at Victor Sullivan's birthday party?! And you called him 'Sully?'"

My brain goes fuzzy when I realize the mistake. No one ever knew who I was to Sully, but for a second, I forgot it was Tom I was talking to. "Yeah, I was, and he hated being called 'Victor Sullivan' like it meant he was some hero."

"How do you know all this?" I shake my head, and Tom seems to get the message. "Sorry, I shouldn't pry."

"It's—um—it's fine. I guess we're supposed to share stuff if we're gonna make this less weird." I sigh and pause the show. "To answer your first question, yes, I was at his party. I was at most of them. And secondly, anyone who knew him well called him 'Sully.' He hated it when people called him by his first name because he said it felt too pretentious."

"Oh." Is all Tom says for a long second as he stares down at the picture. "So you were close then." Another pause as a strangle look crosses his face, "We're you two like—together or something?"

If my eyes could pop out of my head, they would right now. "No, we weren't, but it's nice to know that's what you think about me."

"No, I didn't. I just—there's not a lot of stuff known about him and—I feel like I don't really know that much about you after everything that's happened." The statement feels like a stab to the heart, and I'm pretty sure Tom can tell. "What I meant is, we were kind of close, but it's been a while and, I'm still trying to figure you and what happened out."

"You're right. We were close, which is why I still don't get why you can figure out what happened." I shake my head and try to push back the building tears. "Like I'm still trying to figure out if you're self-centered or just that oblivious."

"Please, Y/NN, I'm really trying here."

"Well you are playing a detective, Tom. Maybe you should go a little method and figure it out for yourself instead of having me spell it out for you." I snap and leave without so much as a glance back at him.

We spend the rest of the day and the next avoiding each other and not speaking any time we go to sleep or cross paths. It's just about as close to torture as I'll ever get. I can hear him moving around, talking to Harrison, and trying to figure out where he must have gone wrong.

The problem is, I wish I could say it was just everyone else, but he's the one that really broke my heart. We were so close that for a second, I almost thought he returned my feelings.

"Please, mate. I just wanna know what I did wrong so I can fix it." Tom's voice echoes throughout the house despite his clear attempts to whisper. "It's just every time I ask her, she gets really upset and defensive. I know whatever I did, it must have hurt her badly, and I just wanna make it right."

It's impossible to hear Harrison's reply, but knowing him, he's subtly hinting at what happened without actually saying anything. I hate the way the thought of him finally knowing and going back to where we once were is both terrifying and entirely relieving. Because despite all the pain knowing him has caused, I miss what we once were, even if it means we can never be anything more.

But it all feels too sudden. The walls are closing in until there's no room to breathe. I grab my jacket and shoes. All I can think is that I need to get out of here right now. I can't be here when he realizes what happens—and likely the feelings I had for him that made it so much worse.

Just as I round out into the hallway, I run right into Tom, who's eyes are wide filled to the brim with sadness and regret. "Y/N, I—"

"I'm going for a walk." I rush past him, but he grabs my arm before I can get too far.

"No, I need to talk to you."

"Please, I can't do this right now." I reply as I avoid his gaze.

"I know what happened, Y/N, and I'm so sorry it's taken me this long to figure it out."

"Fine. You wanna talk about it? Then let's talk." He takes a step back in surprise, and I continue on. "You were one of my closest friends, Tom, but you know what really happened? When it all started? It was when you started dating Nadia.

"She hated me from the start, and I tried to talk to you about it more times than I can count, but you were too infatuated with her to hear a single thing I said despite the fact that we had been friends twice as long as you had known her. So she started spreading rumors that I was jealous and trying to steal you away from her, which is where it all began.

"One day you were my best friend, and the next I was getting called all kind of awful names by people. Then it was the media turning my every conversation with you into some grand seductive plan and twisting both of our actions into this rivalry until everyone—including me—thought you hated me.

"Then the cherry on top of the nightmare I've been living where everywhere I turn someone is telling me how horrible of a person I am, I lost Sully—I lost my grandpa. He was the one person who believed in me when no one else would." Tears are freely streaming down my face now, "And you know what people said when I stepped away to grieve him? That I must have realized I was never supposed to be a Hollywood and given up.

"So yeah, I could barely look at you after that. Because I still can't understand how you didn't realize what was going on, and I hated myself for still caring about you after it all. It took me months to get over you, but now, here you are, wanting to go right back to how it was.

"And of course it happens to be during the one offer I was given where I didn't have to play some villainous character, on the one where I got to be the dream role I've wanted since I started acting. Of course, it can still be gone in a split second." I shake my head. "So go ahead, say whatever you need to help yourself feel better."

Tom's eyes look over every inch of my face. "Y/N, I—there's nothing I can say that can fix this or make either of us feel better, but I'm still so incredibly sorry that this happened. I—I should have heard you out, and I promise, I'll do whatever I can to make this right."

"Please, don't make a promise if you can't keep it." I whisper to him, "I can't go through being let down again."

A soft smile tugs at the edges of Tom's lips. "Then I guess I'll have to be sure to keep my promise at all costs."