Peter Parker & Tom Holland Imagines

corsets and courtships pt.3

It's been nearly a month of secret meetings in the woods. Whispered conversations about novels, theses, and our lives. Along with smiles and blushes we both try to hide.

There are the rare moments we catch a glimpse across a party, but the interactions never go beyond that. It's mostly because we would like to avoid rumors and suspicion. After all, we're both unwillingly betrothed to strangers, which I've discovered isn't uncommon these days, but duty demand we stay faithful to our involuntary promises.

Even if our hearts aren't quite in it.

I push the thoughts back as we walk together into the field. It's our perfect little oasis nestled inside the forest. A place for us to be ourselves—no titles or obligations beyond the ones we choose.

We lay down in the field and bask in the warmth of the afternoon. "So what should we discuss today?"

"What's your dream? No titles, no duties, or betrothals. Just you and the world with anything as a possibility. Where would you be and doing?"

I have to stop for a moment to consider my answer. "Honestly, I don't think I've ever thought of it before. Every time I start to dream, I stop myself."

Tom regards me with curiosity. "Why is that?"

"Because, if I allow myself to dream of life outside my own, the discontent will settle. Then it will turn into a resentment of my family, which would only hurt myself and innocent people." I sigh and run my fingers through the grass. "Although, if I could do anything, I think I would want to find freedom and love.

"My mother used to lecture me when I was young because I would slip away from my tutors and nannies. No one could find me for hours until I decided to be found. Typically, I would run through our land, tell myself stories about knights and dragons, and helping people until I found someone who would stand by me through it all.

"It was silly, but it was much better than lessons on being a proper lady. As I got older, my aunt would tell me the story of the lovers that united the kingdom. Of course, I already had started learning how to fight at that time and was quite unappealing to all the gentleman I knew."

I fight back the falter in my voice, "Then I started dreaming of something that strong. The kind of love that could change prejudice, that makes even the dreary days bright, that--"

"Runs stupid deep?" Tom finishes for me with the words I spoke at our first meeting, and I turn to look at him. The sunlight dances across his features. It lights up his dark brown eyes and ignites them into a thousand different shades of honey, amber, and gold.

"Yeah," I whisper, in complete awe of him. "The kind that runs stupid deep." A curl falls into his face, and I turn away from him to resist the temptation to brush it from his face. "Anyway, it's just a dream. Especially with this arranged marriage, my chances are a lot less."

"I'm sure whoever it is will love you." He whispers, and I keep my eyes locked on the sky. "He would be a fool not to."

My heart patters in my chest. There's a fine line between us, and each moment like this makes it a little bit more hazy. If I had a choice, I would let the moment keep going, relish in it, live in it forever.

But I can't.

The best I can do is carve it into my memory. Etch the sound of his voice and the soft lines of his features into my mind to save for the days ahead when this won't happen anymore. Because I can't live here forever.

"What about you?" I question and turn on my side to watch him. Lady Karina will likely throw a fit later about the grass and dirt, but I don't care--not anymore. "What's your dream?"

Tom sighs and props a hand beneath his head. "I think I would be roaming the Kingdoms, visiting the villages, learning and listening to the stories people tell. Maybe--if I'm lucky--find someone to join me and marry. I would like to live a life outside the politics and courts. Just be myself instead of a name behind a title."

"That sound beautiful." I mumble. "If only we were able to do them. I have a feeling the world would be a much better and more beautiful place. People being themselves without worry or judgement."

"It would be a wondrous thing." He whispers, and we fall back into a comfortable silence. It's peaceful. No fretting over petticoats or rumors. Just the clear blue sky, crisp summer air, and birds chirping happily.

"I should go back." I whisper with a disheartened sigh. "I fear if I stay much longer, my watchdog of a governess with likely start foaming at the mouth."

He nods with that same distant look on his face as he watches me. "Until next time, my love." My movements come to a screeching halt at the additional word to our usual goodbye. My love, that's what he called me.

I try not to think too much of it and force back the smile that threatens to split my features as I quip back the usual reply. "Tomorrow, as always, darling." The words barely escape my lips before I'm trailing my way back to the Sociatatem, a giddy smile on my face and an obvious perk in my step.

His, I think to myself as I brush over my skirts for the hundredth time, he called me his. If only it could be true.

It's a sobering thought, but one I need to constantly remind myself of. I can't let myself fall in love--no matter how enchanting it may be. My parents' have already promised me to another, and there's nothing that can change that now.

Still, there's no harm in allowing myself to dream. So I keep the sound of his voice playing like the swelling music of an orchestra in my head as I practically dance around my room. "Someone's in a good mood today. Aren't you cousin?" Zendaya calls from the doorway with a suspecting grin on her features. "Who is it?"

"Who is who?" I question, completely oblivious to my cousin's suspicions on my little dalliance.

"The mystery person that has been made you happier than I've ever seen you." She retorts in a quiet whisper as if the walls will spread gossip if they hear. "You've been disappearing nearly every day, and each time you come back with this radiance and joy. So who is it?"

Suddenly, the emotions I've been pushing back come washing over me. "He's the best man I've ever met." I tell her with a soft, wistful smile. "We meet in the field and talk about everything. And, Daya, he's so intelligent, kind, and witty. It's the first time I've met someone who can hold a proper conversation besides you."

Zendaya watches me with a glimmer in her eye as she pulls me to the couch. "Tell me everything, cousin. What does he look like?"

"Oh, Z, he's honestly the most handsome man I've met--and not in the usual way. There's something so different about him. I swear, when he watches me with those amber eyes, I forget how to breathe." I sigh and remind myself of my betrothal. My hands fidget with the stained cotton of my skirt as I continue. "It's stupid though. I shouldn't even be speaking to him. I'm going to be married--to a stranger--in a few weeks. There's no point in me compromising that."

A warm hand wraps around my fidgeting one, and I look up to find my cousin watching me with pity. "I know it's hard, but wouldn't it be better to allow yourself some happiness? And there's always the chance that it could be--"

I cut her off, "Don't say it. Don't you dare say that it could be him." Tears brim in my eyes at the waves of pain washing over me. "I can't let myself think that. It would only hurt so much more if it isn't."

"But, Y/N,--" Zendaya tries to argue, but her words fall short as I stand up and make an excuse about turning in early. She steps in front of me, face full of pity as she pulls me into a hug and whispers. "You deserve to be happy, cousin. No matter what form that happiness takes."

A part of me wants to believe her, but my head silences my heart before it can allow the words to take hold. "Goodnight, Daya. I'll see you in the morning."