I hope you read...

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As you may all have heard, something very disheartening has happened. Zayn has moved on, taking a new journey to self redemption which I think he deserves. Many of you like me must be sad, or devistated, or feeling this feeling that you just don't know how to explain. And I want all of you to know that it's okay to feel that way. It isn't odd.

I have been following this band for almost fiver years of my life. They are a part of me and have helped me in ways that no one could have. The mere comfort they have brought me was and is just remarkable. They have had an impact on my life, allowing me to grow as a person, meet new friends, and even find myself a bit. I didn't even know I wanted to be an author until I started writing these stories about them. I am eternally grateful for them and for what they have done for me and many many people out there.

So yes I am a mess.

A piece of me has diminished and has been taken away. But I must go on and I know that you all can as well. If you are feeling these strong emotions and have and or are being taunted and ridiculed for having them, then fuck those people. No one truly understands the connection and feeling and journey these people have brought you along. If you need anyone to talk to, I am here.

Please, though. Do not blame, Perrie or Zayn or anyone. This was his decision as a human being and we should all respect it. He did not do this to ruin our lives or because he hates his fans or that he wants to go solo.

No.

He wants to live his life the way he wants to and even though he is rich and famous, he is still a human and a damn good human at that who shouldn't feel regret for taking this luxury.

I love Zayn and to me he will ALWAYS be a part of one direction.

I am going to finish the Zayn book because I think it may help some people, idk. But also writing helps myself and the Zayn book in particular gives an insight to my soul in a way. So yes. 

And that is really what this was for. I apologize it wasn't a chapter but I hope you all understand that I may not write for a while. I am hurt by this deeply and I apologize if it seems exaggerated, but again like I said before, they took me on this journey that made me realize my dreams and that made me find a bit of happiness and yeah this is hard news.

So I hope you understand. 

I probably will update somewhere in mid-late April and I am sorry again.

My apologies,

Sabrina. 

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