Desire - Merddison

Chapter Twenty Nine

Meredith's POV

"What the hell?" Derek says, stunned. Confusion and shock written all over his face.

"I, uh, I'm sorry, Derek." Is all I can say back to him. I don't know what else to say. I didn't know I was even gonna shout all of that. It just kept building and building and the next thing I know, I blurt it all out, in front of god knows how many people. Damn there's gonna be a lot of fall out from all of this.

"Addison? What the hell?!" He turns to Addison, who looks just as shocked.

"Derek, me and you are over, we're divorced. You can't have thought I'd be single forever." She says back, the shock gone away and looking ready to get into defence mode.

"Well no of course not. I thought you would have gone back to Mark or, or..."

"Or anyone that isn't Meredith?" She raises an eyebrow to him.

"Addison! She's, well a she, I didn't even know you were into women. Not just that, but she happens to be my ex girlfriend too. What the hell happened? You left me and what three seconds you're jumping into bed with my ex girlfriend. What the actual hell? What is this some kind of plot you both decided to come up with? Meredith and I are supposed to be together and you know it. After you and I, it was supposed to be me and Meredith!" He rants. Does he not realise that I am stood right here? And that I can confirm that it wasn't meant to be Derek and I?

"I didn't know either Derek. I've never been attracted to another woman, just Meredith. I'm sorry, the last thing we wanted to do was to hurt you. And I'm sorry you found out like this. But we're divorced, you and Meredith aren't a thing anymore and haven't been for god knows how long now, we've done nothing wrong. And I'm sorry but Meredith doesn't see it that way. She already admitted to me ages ago that she doesn't have feelings for you anymore." Damn his narcissism.

"Except lie to me about it." He snaps. My head is just going back and forth between the two of them, watching them both each time one of them speaks.

"We didn't lie. We don't have to disclose our relationship to you." I snap back to him. Neither of us lied to him. Yes I had feelings or Addison when they were still married.. but we don't even have a label for our relationship right now. Although, maybe we do, I just called Addison my girlfriend in front of tonnes of people. I would have preferred to ask her first or talk about it first, but it's what I want. I want her to be my girlfriend, I want a relationship with her. But I have no idea whether she does or not. She would've said by now, right?

"When did you get together? Is this to get back at me? Is this because I didn't choose you Meredith? You wanted to teach me a lesson or something by going after my wife?" Derek doesn't take a single breath between any of those questions.

"Ex-wife." Addison cuts in.

"Fine fine, ex-wife, but when did this happen?" He asks. I really don't want to tell him that me and Addison had sex on the night of the prom. Not if this is his reaction to me calling Addison my girlfriend. God knows what his reaction would be if he found out we fucked whilst they were still married, no matter how over their marriage was at the time. I hesitate to answer, not quite knowing what to say back to him, not wanting to make him fly off the wall more than he already is.

"After we split Derek. The marriage was over, you knew it, I knew it. We've only recently gone on dates. Our first one was just after Meredith had her appy. So, after me and you ended. None of us knew this would happen. I didn't expect for Meredith to fall for me, I mean for god sake Derek when I first came out here she was still head over heels in love with you, and I certainly didn't know I would end up falling for her too. It's just something that happens, Derek. But this, Derek, this, all of this, it has nothing to do with you." Addison says to him, rather quickly, sounding panicked herself. I think she sensed how uneasy I felt about the question. Like she knew I didn't know how to respond.