1. FIGHTER - the maze runner, newt

Chapter 32

I remember the first night I slept in this room. I remember the quick tour Newt gave me as he set himself up for bed. I remember the feeling I got when I saw his half naked body standing a few feet away from me. It was like someone lit my face on fire while my heart floated on a cloud.

I wish that was the first feeling I acknowledged when I turned my head to Newt's sleeping figure. His bare back faced me as he slept across the room. His muscles flexing and relaxing with ever inhale and exhale.

I felt a pang in my chest at the memory of our fight. It happened hours ago, but it felt like I was still in a verbal battlefield. I knew that after the incident with Thomas and "Teresa", Newt needed an explanation. I just never expected it to go so poorly.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Newt looked at me, hurt and anger dancing across his irises.

"What was I suppose to say, Newt? We both know that if Thomas or I told Alby or anyone about our recognition towards each other and the girl, that we'd be thrown in the shucking Slammer. Or worst; we'd be Banished." I hissed at him, standing my ground no matter how bad it hurt.

"I would never let that happen 'nd you bloody know that!" Newt hissed back, pointing a finger at me, accusingly.

"It was the day I arrived when I notice how everything looked a little familiar. What did you expect me t'do? Walk up t'someone I met an hour before 'nd tell 'em how I found the place they've lived for two shucking years familiar?" I shot back, trying to ignore the tug on my heart.

"I understand where you're comin' from. But you hid this from us - from me. For days. Weeks." Newt looked at me in disbelief.

"I had to! Half the Gladers already think of Thomas and I as undercover serial killers. How do y'think they will handle it if they found out Thomas, Teresa, and I share a freaking telepathic mind-link? Tell me they wouldn't want us dead." I said back, pointing my finger at him briefly.

"You lied to me after I told I would be there for you no matter what. Even after I told you how I felt, you still lied." Newt looked at to me with so much pain, I felt my heart shatter into hundreds of pieces while the thought of melting into oblivion flashed across my mind.

I blinked away the memory, feeling shame loom over me. Today has been a rough day and that fight was just the cherry on top of the ice cream. Sleep screamed to me but the shame of lying to Newt kept me awake. It was like my body was punishing itself for lying to him. Even when he's asleep I could feel the tension weighing on my chest.

A few more seconds of silence, the air became too thick to breathe. I pushed the sleeping bag cover off of me, quickly moving towards the door. I didn't bother with shoes; they were sitting by the window past Newt's sleeping bag. I didn't want to risk waking him up.

I walked cautiously out the door, thinking of where to go. I turned my head to look down the hall, thinking of waking up Minho. But that would mean explaining why I lied to Newt. That would lead to another fight with one of my closest friends. I began making my way down the steps to the bottom floor of Homestead, thinking of Chuck. I dismissed it easily, not wanting to scare the poor kid. I mean, he already has to deal with my bullshit.

I had not even the slightest clue where Thomas ran off to. I knew he couldn't have ran into the Maze; when we were released from the Slammer, the Doors were closed. As I walked through the many bodies sleeping on the ground outside Homestead, I kept an eye out for Thomas. But after two minutes of searching, I still remained clueless as to Thomas' whereabouts.

I breathed out slowly, letting my feet carry me to wherever they desired; which happened to be the tree I usually would try to take naps in. I looked up the tree, feeling the weight of today's events fall on me. First it was Alby's fit, then it was finding out Teresa's name by a telepathic mind-link that answered my suspicions, then lastly, exposing my lies to Newt.