Just A Call

₂₈. Nᴏ Sᴛʀᴀᴡʙᴇʀʀɪᴇs

Meanwhile, Emerson Parker POV

I woke up around 2am, unable to sleep with all the thoughts running through my head. I sat up straight on my bed and gently pushed Emily's arms away from me as they hugged me quite tightly. I ran my hands over my face and through my hair, undoing the messy bun I had made before I went to bed. I put my feet up on the floor and exhaled loudly.

I wasn't afraid to wake Emily, as she was a heavy sleeper. I finally slipped out of bed and went to grab my fuzzy jacket and DocMartens, I also put on my watch and grabbed my wallet and phone. I walked out of my room and closed the door behind me, and unlike Emily, knowing that Bucky was a light sleeper, I decided to take the stairs so as to not also wake anyone else in the compound. I could have left a note for someone but decided otherwise thinking that they would want to convince me to come back immediately.

Arriving at Tony's lab floor, I opened the door slightly and saw him working on one of his suits. I walked over to him and cleared my throat behind him, making my presence known. He flinched slightly anyway but relaxed when he recognized me.

"What are you doing up so early?" he asked me, concern hovering in his voice

"Couldn't sleep, you?"

"Same," he sighed and sat down next to me "are you okay?"

"Yeah," I replied without bothering to cover my obvious lie "I mean, now I know how he feels and I don't really have to hide anymore..."

"But...?"

"But I just wish I could have told him differently and maybe his reaction would have been different."

"I don't think you should be thinking with buts and ifs, what's done is done and now you just have to deal with it like the mature person you are."

"I- Sometimes I just wish I was still a little kid, you know, still loved by my parents and by Peter."

"You know he loves you, Mer."

"No, I don't actually," I sighed "I know he's sorry for what he said to me, but I don't know if he really forgives me for killing his parents. I don't know if he forgives me for abandoning him. I don't know if he accepts me with my past. And I sure as hell don't know if he still loves me."

I was shaking and fighting back the tears that were threatening to fall once more, fidgeting with my fingers and looking down at them. I heard Tony sigh as he hugged me. I didn't move at first, but then I put my arms around him, hugging him tightly. I pulled back after a few minutes and analyzed his face. He had huge bags under his eyes and had some scrapes and bruises. He was paler than usual and wasn't as clean shaven as he used to be.

"What's wrong with you?" I asked him with concern "are you okay?"

He sighed and fell back in his chair, "It's - complicated."

I sat down across from him in a chair, pulled it closer to him and replied, "I have all the time in the world, talk to me. Please."

He looked at me for a few seconds and then turned his eyes to the dark sky and the stars, releasing a heavy breath.

"Pepper and I are on a break," he finally said "and let's just say I'm not living it well..."

"Why? What happened?" I asked him

"She said I was overworking myself and not making enough time for her and our relationship. She went on to say that she won't be back with me until I'm rest," he replied "the thing is, I can't rest without knowing that she's safe and in my arms. But I can't do both."

"Why not? What happened?" I asked and seeing that he hesitated, I added "don't feel obligated, just tell me what you want."

"No, it's okay, I trust you," he smiled slightly "I had a nightmare one night, and one of my suits attacked her out of nowhere. She was gone in the morning. And I don't know what the fuck happened with the suit, but I dismantled it."