Little Do They Know

Chapter 31 - February Break

Going into the February international break, we were comfortably sitting in third place. Our aim was to not drop any more points, and try to secure a spot in the Champions League over City. But before we could continue with the season, I was heading back to the US for camp. I hadn't been since Christmas, because I missed out on Jan camp. Both Cat and I were stuck in Europe, playing for our teams. She is over in France with Lyon, while I'm in England.

As I got on the plane, leaving Manchester, I knew I was going to have to see her. I told Sam and Kristie about my break up with Emily, but this camp would really be the teller of what life was going to be like. Emily and I shared a group of friends, with people such as Rose, Sam, Krisite, Abby. We were all close with each other, and in that same circle. Now, with everything that had happened, I wasn't sure what to expect.

When I arrived in the US, I headed straight to the hotel in Columbus. I was one of the last to arrive, as I had to travel the furthest distance.

As I got to the hotel, Sam came out to greet me.

"BVD!" She called out, as I got out of the cab.

"Sammy!" I cried back, running over and hugging my best friend.

"You seem different," Sam said, walking back with me inside the hotel.

"I feel different," I answered.

"Why's that?"
"Life's changing," I replied, "and I guess I am just changing with it."

"I love that," Sam said back.

"Have you talked to her?" I asked Sam, as we went up in the elevator to my room. I was rooming with Tierna again, as she is my normal, go-to roomie.

"Sonnett?"

"Yeah."

"I have," Sam replied, "and she's okay."
"Ok that's good."

"Are you okay though?" As Sam asked me this question, I knew the answer. At that current second, I had so many thoughts bustling through my head, especially regarding my family and my past. I was too caught up in trying to figure that out rather than sort out how I felt about the break up.

"Yeah, I'm alright," I answered her, not knowing whether I was actually telling her the truth or whether I was hiding my true feelings.

When we got to my room, I opened it to see Tierna laying on the bed.

"I'll catch you at dinner," I said to Sam, before going inside and jumping on the bed next to T's.

"Welcome to hotel room number 16 with BVD!" I said to Tierna, laughing. This will be the 16th time we have roomed together in a camp, going back all the way to France, when we roomed in the World Cup.

"Lucky me," Tierna joked.

"Hey!" I replied, "you know I am actually a very good roommate compared to some other options!" We both knew who I was talking about, as there were some people in camp that we didn't get along with too well.

"Well, you warm to people," Tierna laughed.

We headed downstairs for dinner, and as we sat down on a table with Alana, Kristie, Sam and the others, I saw Emily in the corner, coming down with Kelley. Kelley and Emily had gotten really close since she moved to Washington and I was glad Emily had someone like her.

"This is so awkward," I whispered into Sam's ear, as Emily came over and sat on the other side of the table.

"It doesn't have to be," Sam answered.

"Sam," I said, looking at her, "I'm an awkward person, and this situation is awkward. Let me be awkward."

"Okay," Sam laughed, "have fun being weird and awkward."

I didn't really talk to Emily that night, and to be honest, I didn't talk to a lot of people. I stuck with Sam, who made me feel safe when I felt nervous.

We had a few days of training before the start of She Believes. I was performing quite well during the training sessions, and so was Cat. Because we were in the middle of our season, and the rest of the girls were coming back after a few months break, we were in the best form, and Vlatko even said that himself.

Our first match was against Colombia in Ohio, and we also had New Zealand and Brazil competing in the tournament. Vlatko wanted to change things up a bit recently. He hadn't been calling in the vets into camp and instead has been working with the younger talent. This has meant the entire team has a different vibe to it. Despite being only 25, I am considered one of the older players. I am one of the most experienced, and the top goal scorer out of all the players.

Vlatko had decided to try Cat in the false nine, and pushed me onto the right wing, but told me to cover the traditional nine role when Cat was deeper in the field. I liked this thought process, and I could only hope that it would work out well.

Before the game against Colombia, I sat in the change room, looking at my number 12 Van Dyk shirt, thinking about more than just the shirt. I thought about what would happen if the world did find out I wasn't a Van Dyk but a Meyer. Would it really be so bad? I soon realised that this feeling of uncertainty about who I was, was the identity crisis I was always expected to have.

"You okay?" Emily asked me, as I sat down. I looked at her and nodded.

"Yeah, I'm okay." Everyone soon caught on that we had broken up, but no one was asking us about it. They were respecting our privacy, and I think we both needed it.

Before I could say anything else, my phone started to ring. It was sitting face up, on the bench, and it was a call.

Jackie

"I'll let you take that then," Emily said, walking away.

I sighed, but picked up the phone.

"Hey," I said.

"Hey," she answered, "I've had to try so many illegal sites to get this game up."

"Are you watching?" I asked, surprised.

"Of course," Jackie answered.

"It should just be on ESPN," I said to her.

"Brads, I'm in Holland," Jackie replied, "I don't have ESPN." I laughed as she said this.

"Oh yeah," I joked, "you're right."

"You'll play great," Jackie said, just before I needed to get off the phone for the final team talk.

"Thanks," I said, shyly.

"Text me after," Jackie said, before hanging up. As I got off the phone, I scanned the room to see Emily looking at me. She turned away quickly, not wanting me to see her looking at me, but I saw it. I knew what she was thinking, and, to be fair, I'd probably think the same thing. But, it wasn't like that. I knew it wasn't. I was sure it wasn't... or was I?

The starting team was Alyssa in goals, Alana and Tierna as the centre backs, Sofia and Emily as the full backs, Kristie, Rose and Andi as the midfielders, and Sophia, Cat and I as the forwards. Sam was still coming back from an injury so she wasn't listed as a sub.

"Score some goals," Sam said to me, as I walked out.
"I'll try," I answered.

This was the game where things started to change. This was the game in which I forgot Harry and Josie's advice, and I forgot to lay low. My name was soon printed all around the world, and I was being talked about non-stop. That game was something I wish I could have stopped. I wish I hadn't of played. This was not what we wanted.