𝚂𝚞𝚖𝚖𝚎𝚛𝚝𝚒𝚖𝚎 𝚂𝚊𝚍𝚗𝚎𝚜𝚜

Chapter 45

I knocked on the door of the house, all the lights were out and I didn't want to wake Baba up. I looked ridiculous, walking through the town in towering heels and a fancy evening gown.

A few minutes later, Kenji opened the door with an ice cream tub in hand. He looked at me funny but let me into the house anyway. "What's with you? Why are you dressed like it's your coronation?"

"I was at a gala and the next thing I know I run into Charlotte and then Charles is all annoyed when I should be the one allowed to feel angry."

"Slow down, start from the top. And before that change out of these fancy robes your highness." He curtsied.

"You're so weird." I laughed, walking to my room. I opened my closet and found myself some night clothes. I changed into them and washed off all my makeup, I let down my hair and sunk into bed. I heard knocks on the door. "Come in Ken." I said.

"Dish the gossip." He plopped into the bed.

"I'm starting to think I'm the problem..."

"Why?"

"I'm just. So horribly insecure. I feel like I'm in love with this idolised version of him in my head and the real Charles is nothing like him."

"Ah so you're in love with the idea of him. Not him. What made you think so?"

"Well, I lost pretty much my entire friend group. I chose him over them. And he didn't even tell any of his friends he was dating me. I just showed up to the season opener and they looked shocked."

"And what does that mean."

"He didn't want to make a choice." I sighed, "it's unfair. He got to keep all his friends. I didn't."

"Well you didn't date- oh wait."

"Yeah exactly."

"Get some sleep, we'll talk in the morning." He said, getting up to leave. "And you better actually sleep. Do NOT stay up thinking."

"I'll try." I pulled the covers on. "Good night."

"Good night dummy." He beamed.

***

I woke up the next morning in a worse mood, this time with a headache and overall just quite groggy. Baba and Kenji were at the table eating some breakfast, I smiled good morning and took a seat.

"Kenji tells me you had a fight with Charles." Baba said.

"Yes. Yes I did."

"Why?" She asked.

"I only know reason one of eight million so I figured it was your story to tell." Kenji munched on a slice of apple.

"I think it's the first time we've had like conflict. The first time I expressed my disappointment and he showed me his annoyance." I said, taking a slice from Kenji's plate.

"Well, what made you upset?" She asked.

"I've been avoiding Charlotte and Giada, I lost their friendship because I chose him. And he knows that. He didn't warn me Charlotte and her family would be at the event." I said.

"Was there a way he would know?" She asked.

"He said he knew her father basically managed the casino, he's part of the company that organises all these events. So yes, he did know."

"Are you sure that's really what ticked you off?"

"No." I sighed, "I'm still not over having to lose them. It was so nice to see them all again, reconnect with them and have fun. I don't want to stay mad at my friends, I don't want them to stay mad at me."

"Then sort things out." Baba place her hand on mine, "go talk to them, one by one. Understand their anger, talk to them."

"Charlotte wanted to chat, maybe I should ask her if she wants to get lunch or something today."

"If possible, talk in a private place so emotions can run high." Kenji said thoughtfully.

"Look at you being intelligent!" I teased him.

You: Hi, are you free today? Like you said, we've got a lot to talk about

Charlotte: yes I am

You: how about lunch at my place? So we can discuss things in a private setting

Charlotte: sounds good, I'll be there at 12:30

I let Baba know Charlotte was coming here, Baba said it was good, we could house sit while she spent the day at the friend's place, helping her decorate and furnish her new house.

The build up to lunch felt unreal, when the doorbell rang my heart skipped a beat. Why did I feel so petrified? She was my friend, or at lest she was once. I opened the door to her, she had gotten me some flowers. I thanked her and invited her in.

"Let's cut to the chase." She said, "just why? After everything you saw and everything Gigi and I went through."

"It's not fair. You saw how charming he is, you KNOW how charming he is. I fell for his words, I fell for his actions- I fell for him." I sighed.

"So did I, so did Giada and we all know how each one of them ended. Are you really going to be so blinded by by your feelings?"

"See, I love you. And I have I always loved him too. How can you ask me to make a choice?" My voice cracked.

"Why did he even exist as a choice? I thought you disliked him very strongly."

"I thought I did. He knew how to make me feel special and loved-"

"And he's thoughtful and he made me feel like I live on clouds, he even met my parents and impressed them... should I go on?" She raised her eyebrows.

I didn't know what to say, because that's exactly what my defence was going to be. How he made me feel and how much my family adored him.

"I will never hate you Emi, I can't bring myself to. All these months I tried but it's impossible, all I could think of was what my friend was up to, how do I warn her about what is to come."

"I wish you'd come just a little sooner." I could feel the tears welling up.

"What happened?" she looked at me with concern in her eyes.

I narrated what happened last evening, and basically every race weekend earlier. She heard me out patiently, occasionally nodding to let me know she agreed with me. While all of this was happening it didn't feel like we'd ever had a rift, it felt like we had always been friends.

"That's the scary part about it. He's always incredibly patient, but his anger is cold. And it hangs in the air for a while, it hurts more than outbursts." She said.

"Seriously. I know everyone feels angry sometimes but it's just an emotion I've never seen on him. It hurts even more because it's directed towards me."