Haikyuu x reader

Conspiracy theories | U. Wakatoshi

Warnings: Time-skip spoilers, mentions of drinking, cursing, medicine⚠️

Wakatoshi called you to ask you if it was alright if he got a few drinks with some teammates after practice, they kept nagging him about how he rarely hung out with them outside of volleyball.

You of course told him that it was okay, and that he wasn't a child who needed to ask you for permission, but even with your protests, he still would ask you if it'd be alright.

A few drinks were most definitely not just a few drinks, he was brought back hammered. Apparently Hoshiumi was able to convince him to let loose and drink more than he normally would—which is almost nothing.

He's not a big drinker, but it was nice to see that he had fun with his friends. Apologies were said by his team captain and Kageyama who had to basically carry Wakatoshi, leaving you with his still drunken state.

Luckily they brought him in on the couch so you wouldn't have much trouble, you said your goodnights and they left in their uber.

"'Toshi? Love, are you okay?" You slightly giggle, he was staring at you with a small smile, rosy cheeks and all. You're sure he'll pay the consequences tomorrow with his hangover.

"M okay." He nods, "You look pretty." The alcohol lessening his blunt self, which was not much. You're simply dressed in one of his large t-shirts and shorts, it's what you sleep in and he's almost positive you get prettier everyday.

"How much did you drink?" You ask, trying to get him to comply with you and move upstairs—that is if he can even walk. You're tugging on his hand to bring him up, which he's able to do.

He unintentionally ignored your question as he was trying his best to not put all his weight on you and to stay least walk somewhat straight. Getting him into bed was a success, he was able to undress into more comfortable clothes. You're sure you don't want to try and get him to shower, he mentioned how dizzy he was when he stood up.

"I'll be right back." You lower the volume of your voice in case his head was beginning to hurt. You came back into the room with a tall, refreshing glass of water, he took a few long sips, knowing he needed to sober up.

"Did you have fun?" You kiss his forehead, pushing back his hair as he gets comfy in bed. You've seen him drunk a few times in your life, but this is probably the most hammered you've ever seen him.

"I did, it was nice. 'M not sure I'd like to go out drinking again." He frowns a little.

"Why is that?" You hum, bringing your laptop to your lap to quickly finish your email. He scoots over to lay his head on you, silently thanking you as you lowered the brightness to ease his eyes.

"Not a big fan of drinking." He simply says, clinging onto you, his skin was warm against your cool arm, he was glad the window was open so he wouldn't be sweating his ass off. You nod and continue to type, telling him you were almost done, then you could head to bed.

Randomly, he says, "Do you think the moon landing was fake?" You pause and glance down at him, his eyes were open, his lips forming a thin line, he was thinking real hard about this.

"Wakatoshi, what?" You laugh. Asking him to repeat what he said to make sure you weren't hearing things.

"Or what if shaving cream has stuff in it to make your hair grow faster, that way you're buying more, profiting those companies." He says this all with a straight face. "It's good marketing."

"Yeah, maybe you shouldn't drink this much, love." You chuckle, running your hands through his hair, he moves so his head is on the pillow, facing you.

"I'm serious. Or what about chapstick putting small, microscopic pieces of glass inside the balm so when you put it on it slightly cuts your lips to make them chapped and you're having to buy more and more chapstick." He finishes his rant by letting out a long sigh.

"Did you share these with the guys?" You asked, wondering where the hell he learned these things, this sounds like something Kageyama would seriously believe, or maybe Hoshiumi told these to your husband to cause some laughs, you know he gets a kick out of it.

"They were all talking about it and it got me thinking." He answers.

"Well at least you're over your flat earth phase." You sigh. "I think it's time for bed, yeah?"

"I want to keep talking to you. I barely saw you today." He frowns. "I missed you, a lot." He goes to close your laptop, and carry it over to the nightstand, concluding that you were finished to pay attention to him now.

"I missed you too." You laugh. "I can't wait until you're sober, let's see if you still agree with these conspiracy theories."

"Don't they make sense, love? I mean, we all know they just want money."

"Hush or else the government spying on us through our phone will hear." You egged him on further.

"I don't believe that one, give me a better one. And cuddle closer." He pulls on your arm, he became much more clingy than normal, but this wasn't something drink Wakatoshi only did, he always did this.

"Hmm, let me think. But first you have to brush your teeth and I need to turn the lights off." He nods and chugs the rest of his water down, going to use the bathroom and brush his teeth. He was back in a matter of minutes.

"I'm ready now." He says and lifts the covers, you turned the last lamp off and turned to face him.

"What about chucky cheese reusing pizza slices from unfinished plates to make them faster without having to just waste them and start over." You've seen this one on tiktoks and from the videos, it seems promising.

"I like that one." He hums and closes his eyes, slowly dozing off. He was fighting off the sleep, wanting to speak to you more. "'Nother one."

"I think it's time for bed, sleepy head. We can talk more in the morning. I'm not going anywhere, okay?" You attempted to get him to sleep again.

He groans as he slowly opens his eyes and pulls you straight to his chest, moving his head to the crook of your neck, already feeling himself become more sober by the second and more aware of the hangover he's about to be hit with.

"Would you like some painkillers?" You ask, playing with the strands in his hair, noticing how your little movement gave him slight discomfort. He immediately nods and tells you to be quick.

As soon as he gulps down the pill he's out like a light. Sleeping with his strong arms around you, it became almost impossible to move, but you made it work. You'd have some very interesting stories to tell your friends and family.