Bad Times at Sunrise (La Fortuna Series #3)

Kabanata 39

TW: self-harm

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Kabanata 39

Enough

Pinagmasdan ko ang mukha ni Ico na mahimbing na natutulog sa tabi ko. Nakadantay sa bewang ko ang kaniyang kamay. Bahagyang magulo ang kaniyang buhok at pulang-pula pa rin ang kaniyang labi. He looked so peaceful.

Inalis ko ang kaniyang kamay sa akin at tahimik na bumalikwas upang kalikutin ang aking cellphone. Alas singko na ng umaga. Kaagad akong tumayo at nagligpit. Six AM ang usapan namin nina Levi na mag-check out dito sa hotel dahil maaga pa ang flight namin pabalik sa La Fortuna.

Dahil kaunti lang naman ang dala ko, madali kong naligpit ang aking mga gamit. Naaaninag ko ang kaunting sinag ng araw na sumisilip mula sa siwang ng bintana ng silid. The sunrise reminded me that it's a new day. Ginusto ko ang nangyari sa amin ni Ico kagabi, pero hanggang doon na lang 'yon.

I had to face reality. And the reality was good times were over.

"Are you not going to check out?" tanong ni Levi nang matantong nakatayo lang ako sa gilid habang kinakusap niya 'yong receptionist.

Umiling ako. "May tao sa room ko."

His eyebrow shot up. Mukhang may gusto siyang sabihin pero hindi na lang 'yon isinatinig. Annie's curious eyes were on me until we arrived at the airport. 'Di niya na siguro natiis ang kuryosidad niya kaya nagpalit sila ni Oliver ng seat sa eroplano upang makatabi sa akin.

"You left him?" she accused.

Bumuntong-hininga ako. "Hindi na siya bata."

"And you are not a kid, too! You should have at least told him you're leaving! Ano na lang ang iisipin niya kapag nagising siya mamaya at wala ka sa room mo?"

"Wala siyang karapatang magalit sa 'kin. What we had is a one-night stand. Bakit kailangan kong magpaalam na aalis ako?"

She gritted her teeth. Mukhang iritado na siya sa akin. "Sunny! Ico obviously has feelings for you! You shouldn't have done that to him. Kung talagang aalis ka, sana nagpaalam ka man lang!"

"I know him, okay? Kapag nagpaalam ako, hindi niya ako hahayaang umalis. He'll probably buy me another plane ticket para sabay kaming umuwi sa La Fortuna."

Sinimangutan ako ni Annie. Humalikipkip siya at dismayado akong tinitigan.

"Ayaw kong nakikita kami ng mga taong magkasama. We aren't dating," I continued. "We had fun, yes. But that's because we're in Manila. There are lesser risks there."

Disbelief washed over Annie's face. Alam kong mali ang ginawa ko, pero hindi ko pinagsisihan iyon. I enjoyed the sex, and I was sure as hell Ico enjoyed it too. Pareho naman kaming nag-benepisyo kaya tama na 'yon.

"You're treating him like a dirty secret," Annie said seriously. "I know you have your reservations, but you shouldn't always take the easy way out. Miscommunication isn't cute anymore. 'Di na tayo teenagers."

"Wala naman kaming dapat pag-usapan ni Ico. 'Yang mga ganiyan na 'yan, applicable lang 'yan siguro sa inyo ni Levi o sa ibang magkasintahang gusto ng pang-matagalang relasyon. Ico and I are better off with a no-strings-attached relationship."

She rolled her eyes at me. "Ikaw lang ata ang kilala kong gustong gawing fling lang si Ico. Everyone's desparate to be his wife."

"It's better this way, Annie," I said with conviction.

What Ico felt for me was just probably lust. And it's fine by me because I was horny for him too— too horny that I already had sex with him on our first date. He liked the chase, so I ended it. Nakuha niya na ang gusto niyang makuha. There was nothing else to do.