Petal [h.s.]

FORTY-ONE - YOU HAD TO GO

*this chapter includes a brief mention of a past suicide attempt.

My excuse for my behavior was simple: I was drunk and in love. It turned me insane.

Whatever tiny bit of self control and critical thinking I had left had evaporated as more alcohol entered my system. When I finally snuck out of the party, I did so with a stolen bottle of expensive tequila tucked under my suit jacket. I ran through the front garden, hiding behind cars and trees so I wouldn't be seen. I was unhinged and full of desperation to get Arabella back. I just needed to come up with a plan.

My Uber driver, a lovely lad named Sam, was very helpful.

In Your Eyes by Peter Gabriel started to play on the car ride home. My drunken mind couldn't work out where I knew the song from. Sam graciously let me know that it was from the movie Say Anything. It was the song that played during the boombox scene, where John Cusack held it above his head and played it loud to win back the girl who had dumped him. I immediately decided that this was it, this was my plan to win Arabella back. I didn't have a boombox, but I had my phone and I had my charm.

I thought that getting drunk would numb my feelings for her, would numb my heartbreak, but it only did the opposite. The more I drank, the more I thought of her, the more I felt the need to go home and see her. I kept thinking about the way she kissed Max's palm as they walked out of the party together. I kept thinking about the way she looked back at me right before she disappeared. Her eyes were so sad.

I truly felt that I had lost her and there was nothing I could do to win her back, so I stayed. I stayed and I got plastered and then drunk me decided that I wasn't going to just let her go. I was going to fight for her. I was going to make her see, make her understand that I loved her and her alone. Once I made the decision, there was no talking me out of it.

"I think it's a great idea. Go win your girl." Sam said, smiling over his shoulder at me as he pulled off into the parking lot by the boardwalk.

"Thanks, mate. I appreciate your help." I reached up and shook his hand before climbing out of his car. I grabbed my bottle of tequila off the backseat and began to stumble my way toward Arabella's flat.

The lights were off upstairs, but that didn't stop me. Nothing was going to stop me. I was determined to win her back come hell or high water.

"Arabella!!" I shouted, passing my own dark shop, moving to stand in front of hers.

I blinked as I looked down at my phone, my numb fingers pressing buttons to pull up my music app and search for the song I intended to play for her. I looked back up at her window, but it was all still dark.

"ARABELLA!!!" I shouted even louder than before, my eyebrows knitting together in annoyance.

"Why isn't she waking up..." I mumbled to myself, stumbling back slightly in my drunken state. I swayed around, trying to keep myself steady as I cupped my hands around my mouth the best I could.