Sin ||KookV||

40

The things that none of us will talk about: Jungkook's diary

(Excerpt 1)

On my birthday, Mum and Dad bought me a cake. It was the kind that was about the size of a palm, with a cherry atop the cream because I had won an award in the competition this time. The prize money was a thousand two hundred won. The food today was more sumptuous than usual. My mum passed me a chicken drumstick and my dad also praised me a bit. The only person who wasn't happy for me in this house was Taehyung.

He didn't cover up the hostility in his eyes at all. He even flipped the table over when my mum passed me another chicken drumstick. The serving plates were shattered all over the floor and the cake couldn't be eaten anymore either. He was so young, yet he actually had so much strength and temper.

Dad grabbed the broom and carried Taehyung to the courtyard, giving him a beating while mum stood in the lobby, ear-piercingly shouting in the streets. I seriously found it annoying, so I locked myself in my room and did practice questions.

I know that Taehyung's brain has some problems; that was what my mum secretly told me before. She told me not to bring him out to play too much, otherwise, I'd become mentally ill too. Although I don't like Taehyung, I learnt in class before that mental illness isn't contagious, so I didn't believe my mum.

At night, I was seriously too hungry, so I put down my books and went to the kitchen to look for something to eat. I was startled the moment I opened the bedroom door; Taehyung was sitting there. Seeing that I had come out, he smoothed out the dirty and wrinkled certificate in his hand and returned it to me.

There was still an imprint of a hand on his cheek, and his small feet were in unsuitably large slippers. They had been beaten until they were swollen, and he limped when he walked. He raised his head like he didn't think he had done anything wrong at all.

I asked him why he had ruined my certificate. Taehyung ignored me, burying himself on the sofa and covering his head tightly with the blanket.

I didn't bother with him, because his actions had always been this difficult to understand. I went to the kitchen and took a piece of bread. When I came back, I saw that Taehyung was still buried under the blanket. I lifted up one corner of his blanket and asked him if he wanted to eat some.

Taehyung very impatiently shoved me aside. He said he was looking at the stars. Since when were there stars inside the blanket? I wanted to see too. He hesitated for a moment, then made space for me.

I squeezed into his observatory. It was very dark inside the blanket; in actual fact, you couldn't see anything at all. I glanced at Taehyung. He abruptly said, "I don't like to eat cake, and I don't like to eat chicken drumsticks either, but they can't all be given to you."

I thought about it. That made sense. Next time, I'd pass him some.

As his hyung, I had the duty of educating him as well. I told him that flipping the table over wasn't right. He nodded his head. I asked him if he knew why it wasn't right. He shook his head.

"Mm...because it's impolite. Those who envy others for being good will not be good themselves."

"Oh."

"Will you flip the table over again next time?"

"I won't anymore."

Taehyung zoned out for a while, then asked me thoughtfully, "You earned a certificate, and the certificate is worth one thousand two hundred won. But Mum took away one thousand two hundred won and tossed the certificate aside, so is the certificate still worth one thousand two hundred won?"