Sedatephobia: Mikaelson's Soulmate

Maybe Tombs Aren't My Thing

"How was school today?" River asked as her younger sister, Delilah, entered the backseat of her car.

"It was so good." Delilah emphasized, "Instead of doing our spelling work, our teacher let us colour in."

What sort of bullshit is this school-

"I miss being doing spelling work." River muttered. "Hey, what do you want to eat right now?" River asked after a moment.

"You're getting me food?" Delilah asked, instantly perking up in her seat, "Like, anything?"

"I always get you food when I drive you home." River reminded, "Now what do you want?"

"You pick." Delilah said, "You deserve to pick today."

cutie.

"What else happened today?" River questioned once she decided where they were going.

"Well when we were drawing" Delilah started.

How much time does her class spend drawing and colouring-in in one day?

"I accidentally got a leopard print and a tiger print confused." Delilah continued.

Wait till she finds out our mom was 'accidentally' pregnant with her- I MEAN NO... our parents definitely meant to have another child 12 years after their last one...

"And this boy laughed at me." Delilah continued.

Kids are assholes.

"But then my teacher said it was just because he liked me." Delilah explained.

"That kid sounds like a dick." River uttered causing Delilah to start giggling. "Don't tell mom I said that." River added quickly after she realised what she had said.

"Only if you make me brownies tonight." Delilah reasoned.

Damn, ultimate hustler.

-----

"Hey." River greeted as she entered the tomb, "How are you?"

"I have been in here for a month." Katherine groaned, "I've been better."

"Well consider this me making it better." River said as she placed a duffel bag on the floor before opening it and pulling out the items from inside the bag, "Spare clothes, toiletries, booze, a pillow, a blanket- which is admittedly for me, a candle which you can use for light or the scent, and most importantly." River trailed off as she pulled out a handful of blood bags. "These."

"Why are you being so nice to me?" Katherine asked as River tossed her a blood bag. "I got myself into this situation no matter how hard you tried to help me."

"I'm going to show you the last item in my bag." River started, "And then you are going to take a wild guess." Once River revealed the last item, it quickly showed her ulterior motives.

"This makes a lot more sense now."

------

"Oh hey Stefan." River uttered as she woke from her nap.

"River what are you doing here?" Stefan asked frantically trying to piece together why River was in the tomb with Katherine.

"Having the best sex of her life." Katherine answered on her behalf, "In case you'd like to join."

HOLD THE FUCKING CHEESE- WHAT?

"What?" Stefan blurted out as River choked on air.

I- well...