Crossing Lines

58. I'm fine

Jake's pov:

All I could think about was getting back to Evan. We hadn't been apart for that long but I already wanted to be back with him. Part of me still worried that once he was out of my sight something would happen to him. I wouldn't ever be ready to find him like I did in his car. I never wanted to see him looking so lifeless ever again.

So I could feel the anxiousness fill my body as I slipped into my house. I was planning on unpacking as fast as I could and then getting ready to head right back over to Evans apartment to spend the rest of the day with him.

The house was fairly quiet when I walked in. I wasn't totally expecting silence since a few of my roommates were supposed to have gotten back before me but I just thought they were probably unpacking or something.

There was only silence for a few minutes before Nico appeared in front of me his eyes looking slightly panicked.

"Thank god you're home." He let out a sigh of relief.

"What's going on?" I questioned.

"It's Connor, he's-, it's not good." Nico turned and led me towards the living room.

I opened my mouth to ask another question but the second I stepped into the living room I understood what he meant.

There was empty bottles littered around the room and in the middle of all that was Connor. He was totally passed out and he looked worse than I'd ever seen him.

"Did you try to wake him up?" I asked Nico.

"I called his name a few times and nudged his foot but he was totally unresponsive."

Shit.

Connor was laid out on his back and I was worried about him choking on his own vomit. We needed to get him on his side or awake. I had a feeling moving him on his side was the better option.

"We should try to move him on his side so he doesn't choke if he throws up." I told Nico.

"I'll grab some pillows to prop him up." He walked over to the couch grabbing some pillows and one of the cushions.

Once he got the pillows I walked over to where Connor was passed out.

"Connor." I shook his arm lightly.

Connor didn't move but luckily I could see he was still breathing. Once we got him on his side we were going to have to figure out exactly what the plan was. From the amount of alcohol that was around it was obvious he'd drunk way more than he usually did.

I leaned down to try to move him but before I could even touch him someone stopped me.

"I wouldn't do that." Adam called out to me.

I turned to look at my best friend. He was standing in the living room just watching me with a bored expression.

"Why not? He needs to be moved on his side."

"I know but if you move him like that he'll freak out and you'll make it worse." He explained.

"Then what am I supposed to do?" I questioned.

"Let me." Adam walked over and grabbed two of the pillows from Nico.

I just watched as he dropped them next to Connor and then carefully lifted his head and slid one of the pillows under it. Adam worked gently and he touched Connor as little as he could as he worked the second pillow under Connor propping him up so he was almost sitting up.

"You just got to watch him now but at least he won't choke." Adam didn't stick around as he stood up and walked towards the stairs to go to his room.

Sometimes I forgot how much Adam knew about Connor. They'd been close at the beginning of college but as Connor's drinking got worse their friendship seemed to fall apart. I never pushed for the details but I didn't really need to. I'd seen Connor when he was in a bad spot, I'd heard his insults and watched as he pushed everyone away. At some point it was easier to just stop fighting back.

"What are we going to do with him?" Nico asked looking at our roommate.

I wished I had the answers but I didn't. Something had happened since the last time I saw Connor but I knew he wouldn't tell any of us. Connor wasn't one to share things about him. I lived with him, played football with him for four years and still I knew very little about the guy.

"He's got a problem, he's going to kill himself if he keeps drinking like this." I voiced my concern.

"You think he'd listen to anything we say?"

I didn't think Connor would. I would almost bet on the fact he'd tell us to mind our own business. I didn't know what we could do. We were just sitting back and watching him spiral but how did you help someone that didn't want the help?

"No." I shook my head feeling confident in my answer.

As I watched my roommates slow breathing I knew I'd be here awhile. I couldn't just leave him while he was passed out so I pulled out my phone and shot a text to Evan letting him know I wouldn't make it over to see him tonight.

I had just finished eating something for dinner when Connor finally started to stir. I sat up abruptly as he moved around grunting lowly.

When Connor's eyes finally opened I felt a little bit of relief. I had known that he was alive but he'd been unconscious for awhile and worry had set in with every minute. I wasn't ready for something to happen to someone else.

"Are you okay?" I asked as my roommate sat up blinking his eyes open.

He turned to looked at me a blank look on his face.

"I'm fine." His voice was rough from sleep and still slightly slurred from the alcohol.

"Connor you've been passed out for who knows how long, you're obviously not-,"

"I'm said I'm fine so fuck off and leave me alone." He snapped pulling himself up and grabbing one of the bottles that still had about half of its contents.

I had known it would be like this but still I had wanted to try to get him to talk. He was obviously not doing good and I was worried the next time I got home he wouldn't just be unconscious.

"You know you can always-,"

"Jake I swear to god if I have to listen to another word out of your mouth I'm going to kill myself so please just shut up and mind your own goddamn business." He cut me off.

And that was the Connor I knew. The goofy fun Connor was the one I saw the most but this one. The one that came out when he drank just a tad too much was cruel and used his words as weapons. He had built walls up to the sun to keep anyone from even getting slightly close to him.

Seeing him like this just made me wish that just once he'd let someone in, let someone help him. I knew that person wouldn't be me but maybe he'd find someone that was worth trying for.

A/n:

There is only one chapter left :(... I'm kinda sad to have this all end but excited to be able to finally be able to start book two. This book will be officially finished by Monday and the introduction to The Path to You will be posted Monday as well.

Just for you guys, here are the Kingsley Roommates!

Hope you all enjoyed this chapter!
-Cora Leigh