His dark voice trails down her spine, lighting a path of desire that renders her breathless. "If only I were in a position of no consequence."
Alia's breath wavers when the pad of his thumb slowly glides across her bottom lip.
"Then I could give in...
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"Grief is like the ocean; it comes on waves ebbing and flowing. Sometimes the water is calm, and sometimes it is overwhelming. All we can do is learn to swim." - Vicki Harrison
•
Stars glimmer in the night sky. Branches sway gently with the calm wind. Transfixed by the sight above, Alia's chin rests on her knees as she sits underneath an orange-leafed tree, the surrounding area quiet at this time of night.
It's been hours since she left the confines of her home, unable to sleep after locking herself inside all day. Alia couldn't bear to go out and risk seeing people — risk seeing him. So she stayed inside, lying in bed until the sun descended. There were a few attempts at sleeping, but each one was as useless as the last.
When midnight struck, Alia was out of the house and walking towards the very place she sits. She hasn't been here since the day her notebooks were ruined, all because she was too nervous to ask and too anxious to go by herself.
But here she is. Alone and doing what she wants to do. At least she's surrounded by nature, by something that won't make her go mad when she's left to her thoughts.
Alia sighs, and then she presses her forehead to her knees. She needs to get him out of her head. During all of her twenty-three years of life, Alia has never wanted anyone but her Fated, but that flew out the window when she first laid her eyes on that man — that hauntingly beautiful man. And when she saw how protective he was towards this pack, and how vicious he would become to defend them... it made her heart cling to him. Desire him.
When she saw how they never bothered to ask him if he was okay, even when he was breaking right in front of them, it made Alia brew with anger. She would protect him. She would—
Alia's arms tighten around her knees. Stop it.
He's probably mated for all she knows. But she would've smelled her on him, on his skin. A growl slips past her lips, filling the empty park around her. Gods, what is wrong with her? She's getting jealous over a man she never had.
Alia leans back against the tree trunk, hands covering her face as she whines in frustration. This is torturous. Why can't she find another man to fantasise over? If she can't have Valen, then she'll find someone else. Actually, she'll do something better: she'll find her Fated and fuck him until she can't breathe.
Alia's face deadpans behind her palms. What the fuck is she saying?
The most she's ever done with a man was kissing him, and that was with Aeron. Even if she wants to go that further step and be with someone, Alia's still too anxious about doing it with anyone other than her Fated. Maybe she'll find someone she loves and trusts enough to sleep with, but in her mind, the only possible person would be the one she's bound to. They wouldn't judge her, they'd cherish her. Devour her.
