The Love We Lost

eleven

"Tenemos que empezar a preparar la fiesta de compromiso, ya que escogieron los lugares," and then a pause. "Yo creo que ya es tiempo,"

You could hear the adults speaking in the other room. Their voices making your brain feel as if it was drowning. You disagreed. You didn't think that it was time, but you had absolutely no say in the matter.

"Si! Que emocionante!" You heard your mom say. You could just imagine the big smile she had on her face. You had always had a better relationship with your mother, your father wasn't home often and your mother was always at home with you, so it made sense that you were closer to her. But, she never stood up for herself or for you. She always let your father make decisions that affected all of you.

You could see how she felt small. You saw the way she was scared to hold eye contact with him. She wanted everything to be perfect for your father.

"Mi trabajo como mujer de la casa, es asegurarme de que siempre todo esté a la perfección." Is what she would always tell you, engraving it so deeply into your mind. Perfection was a must in the Villanueva family.

"Ya que te vas a casar, te tienes que asegurar de que todo esté perfecto," She looked at you with a serious expression. "Siempre. No hay lugar para errores. Más ahora que hay tanto en riesgo, un solo error," She held up one finger as she looked at you sternly. "Y lo perdemos, todo,"

"Pero no me quiero casar." You told her.

"No tienes otra opción. Ya lo decidio tu padre, y te tienes que casar," Your mother moved a strand of your hair, softly putting it behind your ear. "Le tienes que hacer caso a tu padre, él sabe lo que hace," She smiled.

You were too busy in your own mind that you hadn't been paying much attention to Pedri, who sat beside you eating some of the cookies that you had baked earlier that day.

"Y/n?" Pedri moved his hand in front of your face, trying to pull your attention back to the conversation the two of you were previously having. "Te la pasas pensando," He chuckled softly before taking a bite of the cookie.

"Todo esto está pasando muy rápido," You told him with honesty, turning to look at him.

"Pues ambas familias tienen una meta específica, no me sorprende," He shrugged his shoulders. "Quieren conseguir lo que necesitan rapido," He let out a breathy laugh.

He was right. Your father wanted the money to save his company and Pedri's family wanted his son to have a good image and to stop messing around.

"Pedri, Y/n!" Pedri's mother called for the two of you.

You huffed in annoyance, not necessarily at his mother, just at the situation. You both got up from your seats walking into the main living room where all the adults were.

You walked in first, your hands behind your back. Pedri followed behind you into the large room. The atmosphere was lighter than previous times, which made you feel a bit more at ease.

"Tienes que escoger un vestido para la fiesta de compromiso." Your mother smiled at you. "Y tú tienes que escoger un traje," She told Pedri, the same smile still on her face.

"Esta bien," You nodded your head in agreement, forcing a smile on your face.

"Tenemos que ir lo más rápido posible, nos iremos a España pronto, y pues, los quiero ver en vestido y traje antes de irme," Pedri's mother said, making you nod your head in agreement once again.

"Sacaré la cita en el mejor lugar," Paz smiled, an excited look on her face.

"Vale mami, gracias," Pedri finally spoke, giving his mother a kiss on her cheek before going back to standing beside you.

You felt your parent's gaze on you and you knew what they wanted.

"Gracias," You said, once again forcing a smile onto your face. If there was one thing you were getting good at, it was faking it and doing what you were told.

Your father and Marcos left to head into your father's office, leaving you, your mother, Pedri, and his mother alone in the living room.

"Pedri te llamará para que vayan por el vestido y el traje," Paz spoke once again. She turned to look at Pedri for confirmation and he nodded his head.

"Okay," You smiled.

"Les diré que quiero una cita lo más rápido possible," She said. "Mas bien, mejor les llamo ahora," She said before getting up from the couch in a rush, your mother following her out of the living room and into the foyer.

"Están más emocionadas que nosotros, y es nuestra boda," He said, laughing.

"Por eso están así, porque no son ellos los que se tienen que casar con alguien al que no aman," You mumbled, letting out a huff of annoyance.

He stayed quiet, turning to look at you. Suddenly the air surrounding the two of you, felt heavy and uncomfortable. Neither of you spoke, sitting in the awkward atmosphere.

"Ya está! La cita es para mañana!" Paz and your mother walked into the room with a big smile on her face, but her smile dropped when she was able to sense the heavy air that filled the room. "Que pasa?" She asked as she walked closer to the two of you.

"No pasa nada," You said, looking at her before getting up from your seat. Your mother looked at you and then at Pedri but didn't say anything.

"Pedri pasara por ti mañana," Paz said, changing the subject.

And just like always, the adults gave instructions never suggestions.

You nodded your head, giving a tight lipped smile.

You heard a door open down the hall, indicating that your father and Marcos would be joining you all in the living room once again.

"Ya he sacado la cita para el vestido y traje," Paz announced as soon as Marcos and your father were close enough. Marcos smiled and nodded his head approvingly.

"Bueno, ya nos vamos," Marcos said as he walked to stand beside Paz.

"Adios," Pedri said softly before he hugged you. "Te vere mañana,"

"Adios," You said, nodding your head before hugging him.

As soon as you heard the door close behind them, you were finally allowed to let your shoulders slump.

"Ya me voy a dormir," You announced before quickly making your way to your room, leaving your parents behind in the foyer.

They didn't say anything, they just watched as you went up the stairs. As soon as you were in your room, you collapsed on your bed, not even bothering to change into your pajamas.