The Love We Lost

thirteen

"Deberíamos de poner reglas," You said as you sat in front of Pedri crisscrossed. The two of you sat on a chaise outside, near the pool. Recently it seemed that this place had become sort of your place. This was where the two of you always seemed to talk about whatever came to each other's minds.

"Reglas?" He looked at you confused, turning his body to face you.

"Si, sobre cuándo podemos agarrarnos las manos, o besarnos, cosas asi," You explained, rambling a bit, most likely due to this feeling like an awkward topic to bring up all of a sudden. You watched him attentively, waiting to see how he would react and what he would say next.

"Besarnos?" He raised an eyebrow. His shocked reaction made you shift uncomfortably.

"Pues si, los novios se besan," You told him, laughing awkwardly, sort of regretting everything you had just said and brought up but you felt like it was something important and obviously necessary to discuss with one another.

He stayed silent for a moment, before answering.

"Esta bien, qué reglas vamos a tener?" He looked at you, paying closer attention as he waited for you to say something.

"No lo se, todavia no lo he pensado," You admitted, making him let out a laugh. It felt like the two of you were a new couple in elementary school, talking about when you would be able to hug each other.

"Tu dime lo que tu estas comoda con, y yo lo respetare," He looked at you once again, his words making you smile and also making you feel much less awkward than when you first brought up this topic.

"Me puedes agarrar la mano, y abrazarme, cosas así, cuando tu quieras," You told him, causing him to nod.

"Y los besitos?" He said, jokingly making a kissy face at you.

"Solo cuando enserio sea necesario," You looked at him with a serious facial expression, once again, causing him to nod in agreement. He tried his best to hide his smile.

"Vale," He said.

You nodded your head, not saying anything else. The two of you sat in silence for a bit.

"¿Cuánto tiempo crees que estaremos casados?"

His question made you whip your head up to look at him. It wasn't the question that surprised you, it was the fact that you had asked yourself the same exact thing just yesterday. It eased your mind a little knowing that he was just as clueless as you.

"No lo se, yo también tengo muchas preguntas sobre todo esto," You sighed, letting your shoulders slump. You began to play with a loose string from the cushion of the chaise.

"Como que?" He asked as he looked at you, curiosity lingering in his eyes.

You didn't want to tell him about all of the questions you had but it felt like this was something that needed to be brought up and talked about. You were just struggling with the way in which to bring it up. Should you just say it? Lay it all out in the open so that there wasn't any more confusion? To help set boundaries? But most importantly, to get answers.

You both wanted answers. It was the least your parents could do after forcing you both into this situation. But, your parents weren't very good at giving you answers, so how would you get them? Well, you both weren't very sure about that.

"Tenemos que tener hijos?" Out of all the questions you had, that was the first one that you decided to spit out. To you, it made sense to want an immediate answer to that question. Your life was already taking a drastic change and you didn't want any more surprises.