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It's a rush the morning they leave for the tour but she, Austin, and Grayson hit the road to the airport with time to spare. It's odd to think she will be gone for almost eight weeks and most of that time will be spent with Grayson and Austin. She has spent a lot of time with them this year but it's been no more than a day at a time so she is slightly nervous about what is to come. She also has no idea what being on tour is like, so that will be an interesting lesson. She knows it won't be crazy, she has learned a lot about the music industry and knows it's mostly smoke and mirrors so she is not sure what to expect really. She also does not know who Austin will be on tour. Is he full Post Malone? She does not know if she wants that, she's not sure who Post Malone is - she hopes the Austin she knows hangs a round. She checks the time and then reaches out to the radio in the car.

"Mind if I put the radio on?"

"It's connected to my phone, here, just play music off here," Austin says passing her his phone. "Oh, thank you but I just want to hear something on the radio," Ava says declining his phone. "Ok, sure, go ahead," Austin gestures. She turns it on and tunes it to 97 then sits back and waits for the morning joke.

"What did the shark say to the clown fish?.....you taste funny!"

The presenter laughs and Ava rolls her eyes at how dumb the joke is. Carter would have loved that one. She hears Grayson laugh in the back of the car. "That's a silly joke but it made me laugh," he says. She laughs softly then reaches over and turns it off.

"You can keep it on if you like."

"Thank you but I just need to hear the morning joke," Ava says then leans back in her chair, content that her day has started like it always does.

The airport is a rush of bags and people. Ava takes Grayson's hand and ducks off to the side and down a private terminal with a woman she does not know but learns is an assistant and a team of people she is meeting for the first time while Austin battles through a crowd of fans. He meets them later on the private jet that is more like a comfortable flying lounge than anything else. The team and assistant are constantly working so Ava does not speak with them but she does not mind as she keeps herself busy with Grayson. Austin is still his usual self although he too is tied up in work mode. But, after they are in the air and everyone is settled Ava feels him flop down on the couch next to her, she puts her book down and looks at him. He is looking at her with a perplexed face, wanting to say something to her but is unsure.

"Spit it out, Austin," she laughs softly.

"The radio...will you explain that to me please?"

"Carter. It was his thing. He used to listen to the morning joke on his way to work and then tell me it when he got home. He loves it. When he got sick and needed to sleep I would listen to it for him and tell him when he woke up. They cracked him up every time."

She looks down and picks up his wedding band on her beautiful charm, fiddling with it. She can feel that lump in her throat. "It's...my biggest regret...my biggest mistake...the morning he was slipping away I listened to the joke then forgot to tell him as he was leaving. I was so caught up in telling him how much I loved him and that he had made my life so wonderful I forgot about the joke...I never got a next time," Ava whispers then looks at Austin, he's blinking back tears but nodding in understanding. "I remember you telling me that when we first met...I just..."

"Me listening to the joke now is not shrouded in sadness. It makes me happy, makes me feel like my day has started on good footing."

"I am happy to hear that...that's good," Austin says smiling at her now. She has to admit there was a piece of her that expected Austin to be annoyed or a little upset - but she should trust him more. He was only worried it made her sad. He will never ask her to move on from Carter's morning joke.

They land in London first and Ava feels the jet lag hit her badly as her eyes burn, Grayson is just as bad as he gets a little niggly and grumpy so they head straight for the hotel and Austin makes Grayson take a nap, Ava does the same. The hotel suite they are booked in is like an apartment so when it's time for dinner they eat in the dining room, just the three of them and Dre. Dre keeps the mood light and makes Ava laugh along with Grayson at his silly jokes, Austin chuckles too although he seems a little distant - his mind wandering. This is new ground for him and Ava knows it will take some getting used to.

The following day Ava feels off, it's the first time she has ever skipped Carter's joke and she wasn't lying about it being a pivotal part of her day but there is nothing she can do. She had asked her mom to listen and send her the joke in a text - it's better than nothing so she pushes her anxiety to the side and keeps herself busy while waiting for the text. Austin has sound check before his concert so they leave the hotel early in a big black SUV with a driver as they all sit in the back. On the way there Ava sees Austin check the time then pull out his phone and fiddle with it then quietly hand it over to her. He has downloaded a radio app that will allow her to listen to the American radio station that plays Carter's joke. Grayson and her listen carefully for the joke and then giggle when they hear it. Once done she shuts it off then leans over and kisses Austin's cheek. "Thank you, that was very kind of you to do," she says. "If it's important to you then it's important to me, Ava," he says quietly.

Ava sits back and looks out of her window at the beautiful city as it whizzes by. She does not feel like crying but her chest does feel like it's going to burst, she's happy. Austin will never make her feel guilty for still loving Carter and with him around she will always feel like she can keep Carter alive in some way. Carter plugs the holes of her heart but she feels him shift a little to give Austin space - they will share those spaces. Austin just might be that imaginary perfect man her mother had been so sure she would never find.

"Do you think we could meet the queen?" Grayson asks suddenly. Ava turns to look at him her lips stretched and a big smile. "Well, I think we can try. That will be our mission while we are in London and your Dad works. We will find out all the places she visits and hunt her down," Ava says. "Yes! We will take photos too," Grayson says excitedly. "Great, I am going to leave my son with a woman who is going to teach him how to be a stalker - it's my greatest accomplishment as a father," Austin says with a chuckle. Ava smiles at him and nods, this trip is going to be great, she can feel it.

Yours Truly, Austin Post - Post MaloneWhere stories live. Discover now