Perfect Illness || lookism x reader

48. Desperation

good sized lil snack (the last one was so long 💀💀)

"Missed me, bitch?"

"Shut up, you crazy bastard." She gasped in pain as Alec pressed the knife deeper against her neck. Beads of blood seeped from the sharp blade.

"Move and I'll slit your throat you filthy slut." he hissed.

"Knives in a fist fight? So unclassy." YN croaked. With the knife so close, she couldn't do anything.

"You bitch, you're lucky I have orders to keep you alive. Jin wants to talk."

"Just kill me now, I don't want to see that greasy bastard." Of course that snake wanted to talk. She was sick of being a tool. Johan's had words cut too deep. She was a tool for Charles Choi too. Johan is right about one thing. Nothing but money will protect me from Gun. Or protect him and his mom. But did he really have to flame me like that for his goals?? Couldn't he have listened???

She really wished that knife would just go ahead and plunge itself in her chest. I might not even die if he's bad at it. cuz I took my pills and I'd heal if there wasn't too much damage.

"Johan, Let's stop this," Daniel said confidently. "Both sides have gotten hurt. You have my answer. Go back."

"So you prefer playing pretend too? I look unstable, you say?" He sounded like he was holding back a massive laugh. "Me??"

(fight sequence)Johan was starting to beat up the J high group.

"Give me a break," his smile was gentle and angelic. Deceptive. "Without any power, you can't protect shit. I'll teach you that lesson now."

It sounded suspiciously like what YN had told him on the Big Deal street all those years ago with their fateful encounter. Goddamn, this really is all my fault...

Jin whacked him on the head with a rod.

YN started to scream his name, but it was cut short by the knife pressing closer. Her limbs were burning with a sudden consuming fire. The feeling was similar to X-FLSIH, but it was a mere echo. It's not my emotions... Was it her fear for Johan that was causing this weird phenomenon? The burn, but not exactly? Had the pills done something irreversible to her, dulling her emotions so that the chemical was not as potent?

It wasn't going away, a constant throb.

The shocking hit to Johan seemed like deja vu, like when Eli had done the same to him at the Hostel. And Gun's exact words? "Come back when you can get up from a hit like that and take out an entire gang." It wasn't over.

"I told you we came prepared to get you, Johan."

"But why?" Johan croaked. "We only had a little more to go. A little more and we would've reached the top. Why?"

"C'mon. Don't tell me you didn't see this coming. Or is this about the fake bank accounts? Or that we just stabbed you in the back." Jin said. "Let's save our breaths. You brought this on yourself, Johan. Can't you hear them? We were better without you. We couldn't find any weaknesses in you at first, but it started to show. Your only weakness is that you only care about yourself. A little more and we would've reached the top, you say? Yeah, maybe. But not us. It'd just be you alone." Jin looked up and winked at her. Of course that greasy snake wouldn't leave her out of this. "Your only friend told you exactly what would happen. Now she's over there at a knifepoint by your own 'members'. I thought she was your weakness for a bit, you know? But I stayed and observed. You would come back frequently, angry and frustrated. But it wasn't because of her. It was because of what she did to you. You really, don't care about anything." He fake sniffled. "It's sad."