Is This Being 'Fine'

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Is fine staying up the whole night crying, hating myself so much for everything I am and everything I've become?
Is fine pretending I'm emotionless in the presence of others?
Is fine allowing my heart to get trampled on over and over again, just hoping that once,
I'll find the one who won't break it?
Is fine taking pills and drinking alcohol, not caring about the effects but just wanting to escape my own mind for a while?
Is fine shown by all the scars on my wrists, all those times I needed someone and no one was there?

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