//TRIGGER WARNING//MENTION OF SELF-HARM//
*PHILS POV*
Even if Dan was just talking to me because he felt sorry, at least I had someone to talk to I guess... I start to walk home as I hear someone shout.
"OI FAGGOT"
I keep walking. I'm used to it now. I'm used to all the names.
"HEY FREAK, IM TALKING TO YOU!"
I pick up my pace, trying to get home as soon as I can. I hear laughter from behind me.
"DONT BE RUDE, PHILLY."
Philly...
Before I realise, one of them has me by the arms. To hold me back. I try and release myself but it's useless.
I'm useless.
Matt, the 'leader' of the group comes right up to me. He looks me in the eyes and says to me;
"Whatever we do to you, you deserve."
I know that. I deserve this. I deserve all the pain I get.
"Hey don't get too close Matt, gayboy over here might try something on you" one of them said, making the others laugh. Then it begins. The beating. It seems like part of the daily routine by now.
I get home and race to the bathroom. I get out my razor. Each cut is a little reminder.
You deserve this.
You are useless.
*DANS POV*
The question is why? Why would Phil do that to himself?
The same thoughts replayed in my mind, over and over again.
Whenever I tried to talk to him, just to start a normal conversation, he'd just push me away.
By the end of the school day, I had finally found enough courage to confront him about what I saw yesterday.
As soon as the bell rings, signalling the end of the day, I frantically run out of my class in a desperate search to look for him. I check his tutor room, then his locker, the library and anywhere you could possibly think of - but he's nowhere to be found.
As I walk home, I pass his house. I look up to see a room with the light on. I remember visiting Phil's house when I was younger.
*Flashback*
"1,2,3....17,18,19,20! Coming to get you!" I shouted from downstairs.
We were playing hide and seek and I couldn't find Phil anywhere. I went outside looking for him when I saw the bathroom light was on, that's where I found him.
*End of Flashback*
He's in the bathroom. He's doing it. Again.
A/N: These few chapters have been kinda sad sorry ;-; They'll be fluff soon I promise and maybe a bit of angst soonnn (I'm sorry ok don't kill me) anyway thank you all for reading and don't forget to vote and comment! love you guys xxx
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Useless (phanfiction)
Fanfiction"You don't always have to be brave." Phil struggles with self harm, depression and is bullied at school. The only person who knows is Dan Howell. But they aren't exactly 'friends'... God knows he could use a friend right now..... ~concept~ 1-24 ~ 20...
