Broken Hearted [Book 3]

Chapter 37 - A Broken Heart

A/N: I didn’t want to write this chapter. I was very, very sad. I didn’t want to write this because it huuurt.
Anyway, enjoy the drama (and don’t forget the popcorn). :’(

***

School had started up again, much to nearly everyone’s disappointment, but I didn’t mind it. Sure, homework was being a douche and I couldn’t sleep in or stay up late, but it was okay.

Ryder had seemed iffy this week. He was being normal, but when he was alone or we weren’t talking, he’d often zone out and his face would become sad. I was curious, but when he came back around, he had a giant smile on his face and he kissed me, as usual.

“I don’t wanna do this stupid maths assignment or whatever,” I told Ryder one day as we were walking to my locker. “It’s stupid.” I murmured, opening my locker and laughing to myself. “I don’t understand why we have math assignments.”

Ryder took a deep sigh and looked away from me, staring down the hall. “Are you okay?” I asked, pushing my books into my locker and frowning over at him. “Marley,” He said, carefully looking over at me. “I need to tell you something.” He mumbled, staring at the ground and keeping his head down.

I felt my heart begin to beat quickly. I could hear it, and I wasn’t surprised if everyone passing could. I honestly wasn’t too sure what he needed to tell me, but his tone was dark and mysterious- something I didn’t think was a good sign from Ryder.

He bit his lip and looking to my open locker, staring at the pictures of him and I. He smiled and shook his head. “I-I-I-“ Ryder stuttered before closing his eyes and slamming the back of his head into the lockers. He began cursing under his breath and I could see he was trying really hard not to cry.

Now I was scared.

“Ryder, what’s up?” I asked in a strangled voice. “Last year,” He sighed. “Around Nationals, the boys took me to the party of the year. I was happy about it and then I realised there was alchohol involved and I wasn’t that happy anymore. But, somehow, the boys got me drunk- and I mean, super drunk.”

“I don’t like where this is going.” I whispered, my heart beating even harder and my hands beginning to shake. I gripped onto my locker tightly and stared at Ryder, who was tearing up and taking deep breaths. “Ryder, what happened?” I asked.

“I don’t know exactly. I only remember waking up the next morning in some bed with some girl... naked.” He whispered.

It felt like someone had punched my heart. Or stabbed it. Or froze it and smashed it with a hammer. Maybe even killed me.

 I felt numb. Like this truly wasn’t happening. It couldn’t be happening. I refused to believe it. This wasn’t happening to me and Ryder. We were fine. He’s kidding.

“I’m sorry,” He said quietly, looking at my tear-filled eyes. “I should have told you sooner but I was scared.” Ryder said, leaning forward. I took in a sharp breath, trying to stop myself from crying, but I let out the tears before the gate of sobs came. “How could you do that to me?” I shouted, running my hands through my hair. “Marley,”

“You said you loved me. You told me that after this happened! And you said you meant it!” I shouted, covering my mouth to try and stifle the sobs. “I’m sorry, Marley. I am. It meant nothing. I was just-“

“Save it!” I shouted, people now looking in on our conversation, curious as to why I was yelling at Ryder. “Marley! Just listen to me!” He shouted. I shook my head and pulled my hair to the side, taking off the necklace he gave me.

I threw it at him and slid the promise ring he gave me off, throwing it into his hands. I promise to love you forever. I heard his voice in my head. I heard him telling me that. And I believed him. I’m such an idiot.

My heart was in pain. I could barely bare it. I wanted to crawl on the ground and die- the only person I have ever loved (that wasn’t a family member) was breaking my heart because he cheated on me. I didn’t want to believe it.

“Marley, please stop.” Ryder sighed, holding the pile of jewellery I had taken off. I took off nearly every single one of my bracelets and stuffed them into his hands. “I can’t believe you’d do this to me, Ryder.” I said quietly, swallowing my saliva to stop myself from screaming my head off. “Marls,” Ryder said, taking a step forward. “You’re not allowed to call me that anymore.” I said through sobs, pushing his hand towards his body. “We-we’re done, Ryder Lynn.” I said loudly, slamming my locker and using all of my self control not to kick something.

I cupped my hand over my mouth and hid a few sobs before turning back to Ryder, narrowing my eyes. “You are a dick!” I shouted across the hall. “You lied to me!” I shouted. “I hate you!” I shouted, pointing at him, shaking my head.

My heart felt like it was going to explode. I wanted to punch something or someone... and I just wanted Ryder to feel my pain. I wanted him to know how it felt to be cheated on- like a stab in the gut.

Without thinking, I ran to the bathroom and I sat on one of the closed toilets, slamming the door shut with my book and leaning against the back wall.

Why’d he do this to me? Why did he have to cheat on me?

I felt like someone was stabbing me over and over and making sure I felt it- making sure I was in pain. I let out a loud sob and held onto my knees tightly, hanging my head back and crying. I couldn’t control my tears. This felt like a dream.

And I refused to believe it was real- I refused to believe Ryder and I had broken up. I wouldn’t believe it. Not in a million years. He wasn’t that type of guy. He promised he wouldn’t break my heart.

But then again, promises aren’t real.

***

I wasn’t how long I had been sitting in this bathroom. I remember one bell going off, signalling the next period, so I had been in here for more than an hour.

I hadn’t stopped crying- I felt like crap. I wanted to go and die. My one true love had cheated on me. One of the only people I love hurt me. And then I lost him.

My chest was sore from continuously sobbing, but I couldn’t stop myself from crying- I was heartbroken. This shouldn’t be happening. I shouldn’t be sitting here, heartbroken because I’d lost him.

I heard a door open and I continued crying, not taking much notice of it. “Marley?” I heard Kitty’s voice over the door. I didn’t have the strength to respond to her or tell her to go away...  I was in too much pain.

The door opened and Kitty came rushing in and gave me tight hug. “It’s okay.” She whispered, rubbing my back lightly. “No.” I croaked out, my voice seeming dry. “I heard what happened with Ryder... and I’m sorry.” She whispered. I sobbed again. “Marley, come with me and get something to drink.”

“I’ll be fine.” I said quickly, pushing her off of me. “No, you won’t be! You’re heartbroken because you loved him and he broke your heart!” Kitty shouted. I shook my head and held back my sobs. “I’ll be fine, just let me cry.” I murmured, closing my eyes and shaking my head.

The pain still lingered in me. It still hurt more than anything. My heart was beating faster than it ever had... I didn’t want this to be happening. I wanted to reverse time to when everything was good and I wasn’t in pain. I wanted to be happy and with Ryder again.

I wanted this heart to put itself back together, but I doubt that’d ever happen. Ryder stepped on my heart and I knew it would never be put back together. I trusted Ryder to catch me if I fell... and he pushed me off the cliff.

Long story short, I had a broken heart... and it hurt more than I expected.