Five

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June 19th, 2020

I feel like Peyton is around Sam more than he is around Jack. That's not a good thing either. I fear that he's not going to have that special bond with Jack. I swear that when I picked Peyton up from Sam's house the other day, he called him 'dada'.

As I place Peyton on my hip, I grab my keys and phone, shutting the car door. I walk up to Sam's front door and Peyton grows more excited with each and every passing second.

"Hey, buddy!" Sam says, grabbing Peyton from my arms.

"Dada." Peyton claps in Sam's face.

My eyebrows furrow, "what was that, baby?" I place my finger under his chin.

He tucks his face in Sam's neck, "dada."

I shake off his words, I hope he doesn't stick to that growing up. I tell Sam that I'll be back in two hours to get him and I can't get over Peyton calling Sam his dad. Unbelievable.

I rush into my car, putting on my Dior sunglasses and grab my phone to call Jack before  going to the hospital.

"Hey, Jack. I just wanted to tell you that I'm on my way to the hospital. I just thought you'd want to know." I purse my lips, waiting for his response.

"I'm at the hospital waiting for you, baby." He tells me and my heart leaps out of my chest.

"What?" I breathe.

"I'm going to be here during the check up with you." Jack explains and I smile.

"Okay, I'm on my way." I hang up the phone and pretty much race to the hospital.

*

As we're waiting for Dr. Glendale to return back to the room, I squeeze Jack's hand. His eyes avert away from his emails and to me.

"I need to to you something." I bravely speak up.

He sits up straight, "you're not divorcing me, are you?"

I narrow my eyes at him, shaking my head. What in the world?

"We need to manage your time." I softly say and he scoffs.

"This again?"

"You know what, Jack? I don't have anymore tolerance for your attitude." I snap and his eyes widen.

"What are you talking about?"

"Whenever I try to make us a family- have us all spend time together- you get all attitudinal and I'm sick of it. It's like you don't even want to try in our family anymore." I snatch my hand away from his and his face softens.

"That's not true. It's just-"

"Work. I know, it's always work." I say.

"If you know, then why are you being like this?" He searches for some type of emotion in my eyes.

I'm hiding my sad and hurt feelings quite well. He can't read me as well as he used to. Jack's always so distant.

"Today, I went to drop Peyton at Sam's place and he called Sam, dad." I tell him. "That just proves you're never home."

"What?" Jack whispers, gaping at me. "I spent four days with him!"

"Sam's taken care of our child more than you have." I say. "I don't know if we should have another baby anymore."

"What? What, why? Camila, please don't do this-" he rushes, but then is cut off by the door opening.

"Good news, Mrs. Gilinsky, but also bad news." Doctor Glendale moves his glasses up his face.

"I'm ready for whichever first." I place both of my hands on my knees because I don't want to hold Jack's hands.

I'm going to play the child card and not talk to him or look at him. I'm going to bring him just as much attitude. I don't mean to be a bitch. It's just difficult with him never around.

"Good news first, I suppose." He gives us both a brief smile. "You are not infertile." He tells me and a smile grows on my face. "But with good news always comes bad news. You have half of the eggs than the average 25 year old American female."

My eyes widen at his words. That's better than not being infertile.

"You might want to start trying now, rather than later." The doctor adds and I blink away my tears, looking down at my fingers.

"I'm not sure if we're going to have another baby. Thank you though, doc." I give him a forced smile and he nods, telling us he'll give us a minute to discuss.

Jack turns to me immediately, "Camila, are you serious?" He hisses at me.

My tears flow freely and I shrug my shoulders, "does it look like I'm kidding, Jack?"

"You can't do this. We both agreed on having a second baby, please." Jack begs, running his hand through his hair in frustration. "I'll take more days off at work."

"You can't do that. If you do, you're just going to complain." I shake my head.

He scoots closer to me, using his thumbs to wipe away my tears.

"I won't, I promise. I want another baby with you. Especially if that might be our last one."

"How many were you expecting?" My eyebrows twitch together.

"Maybe another two, but that's okay, baby." He tells me and I shake my head.

"I just need time to think, please."

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